Nothing to Lose
by Still Forgotten
Summary: Because Iruka's too prying,and losing the boy's trust is not an option now that that he finally has it. But trust is meant to be tested, and now, Iruka think's he's failed. IruNaru Rated M for language and implied or possibly potential rape
1. Nothing to Lose

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**Nothing To lose**

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**A/n- YAY! My first Naruto ficcy! I know this doesn't exactly follow a timeline, but I tried my best to keep up with what I know so far. Really hope you like. PLEASE REVIEW! .:begs:.

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Disclaimer- …HAHA. HAHA. Kakashi is **hot**. And Naruto. And Iruka. Sasuke can die. (Oh dear, this isn't much of a disclaimer, is it?)

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The swing wasn't always empty. Not any more, at least.

"Look, mama! There he is!"

Back…

"I hear there's something wrong with him…"

And forth…

"Oracha sensei called him a fox, but I don't see his tail. What kinda fox doesn't have a tail?"

On a pendulum of spiteful words no seven year old should be called. It didn't take years of training to imitate a smile, but to maintain an illusion day after day, despite the words and the looks, _that_ had taken years to perfect. Maybe if he always smiled, someday… somebody would smile back.

.o.

"Um, sensei… why did you fail me this time?" Baffled blue eyes looked up at the man behind the desk as he clutched yet another paper with the same hated mark scrawled out on the top right corner. "I studied _really hard_ like you told me to do last time. See?" He handed over the sheet to the elderly man, hope written in his eyes. Hope that there had been a mistake, that this time, Oracha sensei would smile at him, just for once, and hand him his genuine scores.

"Look, Naruto," The man began, not bothering to hide the contempt he felt towards the child. "I just don't think you're ready to progress with everyone else. Maybe next year, yeah? Until then…"

Another transfer. No matter how hard he tried, how long he worked, how good his scores, there was _always_ a reason. He had thought, maybe this time… but no one showed him the same compassion they reserved for the other kids. The higher kids. The better kids.

"It's okay, sensei…I'll do better next time, I promise!" There was a pause, and another strained smile.

"There…won't _be_ a next time, Naruto. I'm going to have to transfer you."

And the smile faded. Just as it had the last time and the time before that.

.o.

Iruka suppressed a shudder at the very proposal the man had proffered to him.

"I'm not sure I'm the most qualified-"

"You're the only one left who can take him. I trust you read his file already?" Who hadn't read the kid's file? The whole town knew him by sight, or at least, the sights he made while destroying famous…well, sites.

"What I'm saying is, maybe it would be wise to find someone else with more time…more patience…"

"He's thirteen for crying out loud, and the boy's still fumbling around the _academy."_ The man had a point there. What kind of adolescent had such a substandard record that he was handed off twenty eight times to new teachers in the course of five years, and who's scores indicated a toddler's conceptual understanding of the world? Obviously the very boy he was so unwilling to accommodate.

"You understand why I can't just take him, right?" Iruka struggled hopelessly to win his case over. "You know my position would be bias, to say in the least."

Nudging the boy's file folder closer to the scarred chuunin, the man smiled sadly. "Haven't we all been?" Then, "Give him a chance. God knows you'll be the first who has." The silence raged so loudly it was giving the man a migraine. He sighed.

"…alright. We all deserve a chance." Suddenly the prospect of a warm bed and some headache pills appealed to him far more than the tests he had yet to grade.

.o.

"…You're late, Naruto."

"Naw, Sensei… everyone else is just early!" The boy attempted a pout, but in the seconds it took for the man to scowl, it had transformed into wild snickering.

"You know your grades could stand for a little more of your attention, _Uzumaki._" It seemed Iruka had hit a vulnerable spot. Was this short termed mood swinging child really the monster who had murdered-

The chuunin shook his head, wiping the thin layer of sweat off his forehead with the back of his hand.

Naruto pointed an accusing finger at a slumbering student drooling on his desk in the back of the room.

"_He_ never pays attention and _he's_ still passing!"

"And that's because dear Achi-kun manages to stay awake for at least half the class. You, on the other hand, arrive here in the _middle_ of class, and either sleep it off, or prate it off. In your seat, Naruto." The man rubbed his temples and sighed for what must have been the hundredth time that day. "Anyway, before the class was so _reprehensibly_ interrupted, I was saying that today we'll be having-"

"Hey, sensei, where do I sit?" The man peered up into his rather small classroom, complete with over fifteen empty desks, and massaged his closed eyes with two fingers.

"Anywhere, Naruto. I don't care, just sit down and let me at least finish my lecture for today." Why didn't his chuunin training cover teaching impractical students? "As I was saying-"

Someone screamed.

"Sensei! Make him give me back my desk!" The man took in the scene with all of the temperance of a wounded animal. The Haruno girl, Sakura, if his memory served, was sitting on the floor, looking for all the world as if she were ready to get up and slug the troublesome boy sitting backwards atop her desk until he begged for mercy.

"No, but sensei said I could sit _anywhere_, and when I become hokage, I'll _own_ it all anyway!" Then, as an afterthought, "_And_ the ramen stand!"

"Get _off!"_ With a swift kick, the floored girl overturned the desk, and to everyone's sick mirth, upending the blonde unto his backside, bits of paper drifting to land on his head and stomach.

Naruto melted backwards, away from the fiery female.

"No you _don't_, Naruto! Pick it back up!" There was a moment's pause. "NOW!"

Iruka raised an eyebrow as the problematic boy sped to right the upturned desk. Hands thrust deep in the pockets of his orange jacket, the teen moved to the back of the classroom, extending a leg to trip the livid girl as she stood up. It would have worked too, if Sakura's foot hadn't lodged itself seven inches into Naruto's behind.

"Sensei, did you see that?" The blonde pointed an accusing finger in Sakura's direction, a safe distance away from the fuming girl, whining pathetically loud over the cackles of the class.

"Gee, I'm sorry, Naruto…I must have missed it." The man looked up over the top of the book he now held, gazing innocently down at the incredulous teen. "Tell me sooner next time, and I might be able to do something about it. There's a seat right over there in the back. I'm assuming you can make your way over without more hassle?"

Naruto flopped angrily into his seat, the backrest flipping around to smack him smartly in the shoulder.

"Oww!"

"Oh, and watch out for the backrest there, it's rather loose, but you should find it rather obliging so long as you don't slam into it. Do be careful." The teacher flipped the book closed with one hand, standing up from his seat with a disinterested side glance at the sulking teen, a thick stack of papers imprisoned in his free hand. "Now, with out further distraction, I'd like to move on to the main event of today. I'll be administering your first test, but it's only to gauge how far along you are in your studies. It won't be graded, whereas it _will_ find it's way into your permanent records, so do try to put in some effort." Naruto caught the indistinct glance in his direction, and grinned.

.o.

"Hey, sensei! I'm done! Pretty quick huh? And I put all my effort in to it, just like you said!" The boy waved the paper around, not attempting to remove himself from his seat.

Iruka found himself retracing the scar along his nose with a finger, staring at the child who had manage to disrupt well over half the class by now with his rather _loud_ displays.

"So bring it up here. I'll grade it now." He tried to sound sensible, but a little more disgust than he would have liked played sharply into his words. Naruto, happy to oblige the man's request, leapt from one occupied desk to another, throwing papers and pens, and even an occasional unaware person or two, into chaos all around him.

"Here you go!" The blonde seemed to be waiting, so with a shrug, the teacher turned the sheet over and glanced at it, anxious to see the results.

An eyebrow slowly disappeared behind his slightly sagging headband.

"Pretty cool, huh sensei?" Naruto flipped the thumbs up sign at his teacher, waiting for the man's reaction.

He sighed.

"Well, you managed to skip half the test, and as far as I know, the answer to problem 19 is _not_ a- hey, what is that anyway?" The man scrubbed the bridge of his nose as he took a second look at the sadly drawn figure that was not unlike the rear end of horse…or maybe it was a monkey getting high off poison ivy?

"Oh, that's you, sensei! Misuki-san said that when pigs fly, I'll be the most talent artist in the world, but I got up a little late this morning, so I guess I missed them. Pretty nifty, isn't it?" His grin grew wider.

"I feel… old."

"Don't feel _bad,_ sensei! I'm sure you're not _really_ as old as you look!" The exuberant grin grew with every wrinkle that embedded itself in the man's frown.

"I'm not completely wasted yet, kid. I'm only twenty si-" His eyes widened. "Gods, I _am_ old," he finally muttered into his hands.

Naruto nodded fervently as finishing students turned their…rather more completed… tests over in a growing pile on the desk. Iruka's headache grew with it. How could this kid, _any_ kid, succeed in making him into a complete idiot? He raised his head slightly, eyes focussing on the class behind Naruto's abnormally large skull.

"Eh, dismissed, dismissed…" He waved his hand absentmindedly in the air. "I'll see you all tomorrow in any case. But… not you, Uzumaki." Said boy had already turned heel and begun to run, halfway out the door when he spun back around.

"Eh?"

"Come back here, Naruto…we have to…discuss some things…"

Umuino Iruka was not easily startled. At least, not visibly, but this had to be one of the rare moments that he was truly taken aback. The piercing blue eyes that shot daggers through his body had turned cold, the sorrow they once displayed in this exact position exactly twenty eight times in the child's life had turned into a petrifying bitterness no boy of thirteen should know. 

" Well?" he demanded, and the harsh tone set the man back even further. Had he seriously misjudged the boy? Was this the monster that had murdered his parents making it's existence known? The fury and…was it pain? Hovering in those eyes that had been laughing only moments before… 

he cleared his throat in an attempt to compose himself. 

" You're behavior isn't exactly showcasing desired material, Naruto. I think that we should-" 

A hand with the same whisker like scars as on the child's face sliced through the air to land on the desk. 

" Get to the damn point! Another transfer? Well, sorry, but I'm stuck with you. It's not exactly a secret that no one else will take me." 

" That wasn't what I had in mind. If you'd listen to me, I'd really like to give you a fair shot with the rest of-" 

" Give me a break, _sensei._ You can't honestly say that you haven't been treating me any different than all the other screwed up kids here." 

And what really hurt the man most was… it was true. 

" I won't deny it, no." The shocked expression lingered only a heartbeat on the blonde's marked face. "But I'm making an effort-" 

" You call looking the other way when miss six-inch-heel ninja decides to stick it where the sun don't shine an attempt at making an _effort?_

"You were brooding on that _this whole time?"_

"No. You get used to treatment like that when it's been an ongoing bias all your life," he hissed back at the startled chuunin. "So what the _hell_ do you have against me?"

Words choked in the back of the man's throat. Spiteful words he had wanted to yell at the damn kid for some time now, lodged there, as the man stared dumbly back at the smaller boy.

"…you honestly don't remember?"

"Well you better spit it out, cause no one else will, that's for sure." How could his eyes be so old, and yet his tactics be so underdeveloped?

"If you really don't know, than it's not for me to inform you."

Fire burning the stables, the houses, the people.

"How could it be…"

The screams of the trapped, of the hurt, of the brokenhearted.

"That you've no memories…of that time?"

A child left crying by his unmoving mother's side, her dress blowing over her face as he begged her to open her eyes.

"Well, I don't know what the hell I did, but if this is about that time I stole the hokage's boxers, I don't see why everyone would be so damn uptight about it still-"

"No, it's not that, but look, I can't allow this to go on in my classroom, regardless of the reasons. It doesn't make me look too sharp when I can't even keep a tab on what's going on in here. I don't want to suspend you, Naruto, so I'm going to go easy on you this once. Instead of dropping you farther behind everyone else than you already are, I'm only going to revoke your eating privileges at the academy with the other students. Maybe that might retard your obsessive gorging habit in class, yeah? Just don't forget to grab something when you get home, okay?"

Iruka smiled, even if it wasn't sincere. "And I'll drop this test for you, but I expect better results at the field assessment next week, okay?"

"But-"

"You can thank me later. Now get out so I can actually tell my superiors that I've been working."

.o.

Something had changed, and it had taken the chuunin an exact three days to appreciate what it was. And he wondered how he ever got his certifying headband. He'd be damned if the discussion with the boy had any impact, but something had reformed the caustic child since the previous three days. Iruka frowned as he looked at the fox boy fiddling with his pen, wondering what about the air in the classroom made him so uneasy, when the click of a pen hitting the solid ground woke him from his thoughts.

It was the silence.

Or to be more exact, it was the lack of energy that used to emit from the boy in great waves of destruction.

And as desperately as he had wanted it before, he wanted it gone. The put out expression on Naruto's face had no right to be there…like a fly on a spider's back.

Was it something he had said before?

"Sensei, do you have something I can eat?" Iruka froze in his seat, wondering idly how he could have let the boy he had been watching all day sneak up on him. Then again, it wasn't exactly sneaking when the kid was two feet in front of him, holding out a hand for food with another one of his annoyingly fake grins tagged into place.

"The whole idea of cutting off academy food was to inspire you to go out and get your own, Naruto. In any case, they fairly starve us teachers as it is." And without further question, the blonde turned to leave. Why did such a simple, and undoubtedly startlingly quiet act bother him so much?

…because it was quietly done, his thoughts voiced off in his head. Naruto was, by no means, a quiet person.

"Naruto." The boy turned. "Here." He threw his orange clad pupil the apple he had reserved for a lunching snack, and was rewarded with a smile that didn't quite reach his student's pure blue eyes. And he left, his fingers turning white as he clutched one of the desk's edges on his way out in a moment of instability.

It's demanded in a ninja's most basic training to detect any subtle movements and behaviors in those around him, and Iruka was no novice to such recognitions.

"What are you hiding, kid?" the man whispered to the walls of the empty classroom. "Why can't you tell me what's wrong?"

.o.

There are some mornings that upon waking up with the same bitch of a headache you get after some shorty ninety pound nerdy ninja kicks your ass into next week, that you just need a solid cure of tea and a hot bath. He could do without the tea for the moment, because frankly, he wasn't sure if he was capable of making the damn beverage, but the bathing facilities at the academy were bound to be empty so early in the morning.

It was nice, really. Stepping out onto a path barely touched by the sun's first rays, knowing that your destination wasn't quiet yet a cramped and rather hot classroom. The pre drawn out water of the tubs was with no doubt going to be warm and soothing…

Stripped of his clothing with nothing but a towel hanging loose around his waist, Iruka stepped into the first bathing room…

And nearly toppled right back out again. Standing hip deep in steaming water, and still naïve as to what was unfolding rapidly around him, a certain blonde haired youth watched the ripples in the waters about him, occasionally scooping the liquid in his hands to splash over his face in a brilliant cascade of broken imaged droplets. The teen sighed for a moment, then dipped his hair under the surface, lightly scrubbing out the built up grime. As he pulled up, he froze, eyes shooting open wide, meeting the equally startled stare of the flummoxed chuunin.

"Um, hi, Naruto…"

"…Iruka sensei…?"

Bathing plans abandoned, Iruka shook his head and turned around, heading back out the way that he had entered.

"I'll… uh… see you in…uh…class today. Or, well, the field, cause you know, the test and all…"

Naruto watched the receding figure disappear into the shadows, still baffled and quite miffed by the sudden, and rather unexpected, encounter.

.o.

"Final fucking exams today, guys. Get in your damn places." The field instructor, looking bored out of his skull, pointed to Naruto. "Didn't I fail you last year? What the hell are you doing out here with the smarter batch of intellectually challenged suckers?"

Iruka frowned slightly from his watch post on the outer edges of the training field. What was this man playing at?

"What're you talking about? I told you! I'm gunna become a ninja!"

"You're destined to scoop ramen into fat people's dishes at the store downtown."

"Damn straight! That would be cool… but I'll become Hokage first!"

"Not under my command you won't."

Iruka's scowl deepened. Even if he himself had at one time or another been motivated to fail the kid, he had at least been discrete about his feelings and actions. Naruto bounced back with the other members of the class where they had assembled in a not-so-perfect line.

"Alright, dammit." The instructor began pacing the line, like a drill sergeant to his troops. "All you brats have to do is finish the damn course." He huffed a breath and smirked down on them. "In three minutes."

The scarred chuunin cast a quick glance at the boy he had been eyeing since his arrival, then did a double take, peering closer at the blonde's paling face. What was wrong with the kid? A thin sheet of sweat covered his brow and upper lip, his knuckles shaking as his fingertips dug into the flesh of his hands.

"You, with the pink hair. You're first."

"Me?" Sakura squealed, pointing to herself, whether in pleasure or nervousness, it was anybody's guess.

"I don't seen any other pink hippos lazing about, do you? Go!"

.o.

Naruto silently cheered the girl on from his position, smiling inside every time she flawlessly executed a move or threw a kunai. He shouted, only one in over 20 people as she finished in under two seconds, beaming brightly and throwing vain glances at an unacknowledging dark haired teen.

The procession seemed to thin as each person completed the obstacle course in the allotted amount of time, and for the first time, he was truly unsure.

"You, with the blonde hair. You might as well go for it."

The teen looked up, wondering idly when the line had actually disappeared. And was it apart of the course for the scenery to be…spinning… before his eyes?

"You're right. You wouldn't have made it anyway, boy. I told you before, you don't belong with this bunch."

Naruto took a step forward, his smirk growing into the grin that had become his crutch for all these years.

"Are you kiddin'? I'm gunna finish this so fast it'll blow Sasuke's skirt over his head."

Some of the girls squealed in delight, while others cooed over the imagery.

"Then go! I'm counting down!"

Naruto took off, kicking dust into the man's face as he left, laughing all the way down the track. Funny, how short his breath was coming, not even half way through the course. Scary, how his legs nearly gave way while jumping. Odd, how-

He stopped, his vision darkening for a moment, sides heaving as his muscles went lax, swaying from side to side in an effort to stay upright. He hadn't even noticed that the throwing knives he was supposed to be using here were still in the instructor's hands. They had been this whole time, of course. After all, no one would make the time limit if they turned back at the weapon stage. And now he was in the exact position everyone wanted him to be.

A wave of nausea swept through him and he gagged, but of course, nothing came out. It wouldn't have anyway, would it?

"..uto?" Ah, he thought he had heard his name being called before.

Someone a distance away laughed. The voices whispering were loud… so loud…but he couldn't make out any of the words… maybe if he strained just a little more…

"..ruto…!" And there it was again… how amusing, and yet, so perplexing. Maybe he should check it out…

But checking it out required moving his legs…something he could not afford to do without toppling forward…

He just couldn't maintain this. His legs would give way any second. Why was everything swimming around in his vision?

And somewhere from the field, a voice, so triumphant…

"FAILED!"

And he pitched forward, unconscious before his head slammed down to meet the ground.

"NARUTO!"

.o.

"He's just playing around, right sensei?"

Sakura? He wanted to grin…really grin and really laugh, to know that Sakura couldn't hate him, no matter what she said and did. Her voice couldn't deny what little worry she felt. …maybe she might even share some of her lunch with him…

"We should get his jacket off. See if he's injured." Naruto tried to shake his head no. Tried to move, but gentle hands had already pried the clasps apart and unzipped the orange jacket. It slid off his shoulders, and he hoped pointlessly that he hadn't sweated too much. Sakura shouldn't have to smell him like this.

"Shit. Look at his ribs. Who the hell's been feeding him?" The same hands that had removed his jacket slid carefully down his side.

"…uka sensei?" He cracked first one eyelid open, the other following suit just a moment after. What was he doing on the ground, looking up at all his classmates, and a very concerned Iruka-sensei?

"Naruto?" He tried to force his grin on, but wasn't sure if he had succeeded. They couldn't see him like this. Couldn't see him so weak, so…human. Maybe if he was lucky, they wouldn't see the-

"Bruises? Naruto, what happened?" The man's voice was soft. Caring, and for a moment, he could pretend the chuunin really did care. But only for a moment. Soft fingers removed the sweat stained tank top he had been wearing under the jacket, and small gasps oozed from the group. So they had seen the results of all the beatings people had administered on him in various isolated places around town. Now he was in for it.

"Leave the brat there. I'll haul him off later." The instructor had managed to find his way over quite quickly, pushing through the crowd until he hovered haughtily over the boy.

"S'kay…I c'n stand up 'n my own," he slurred, rolling on his stomach and pushing himself up on to shaking knees.

"Stubborn kid," the chuunin muttered kindly, wrapping his arms around the blue eyed youth's torso.

"I said I'd move the boy out myself-"

"Don't you dare touch him," Iruka snarled, lifting Naruto to his feet. "You send the others back, but you leave him with me." And without looking back, he led the teen off the field, one arm pulling his student firmly against his side by the waist, the other steadying his shoulder. The blonde would never admit it, but it somehow felt good, almost right, to have someone he could lean against when he needed it most. He closed his eyes… and sighed.

.o.

"Where're we, sensei," he muttered sleepily into the man's…chest? What was he doing there? He stiffened, and his teacher set him down on an unfamiliar couch.

"You passed out again, so I had to carry you, but don't worry. You walked most of the way."

"Oh… so where're we again?" Naruto hid his uneasy by looking around the small room, not bothering to take in what he was seeing.

"I took you to my house. I…wasn't exactly sure where you lived, and I didn't think you wanted Asha-san, one of the most uneducated educated medics around, poking about your body. Was I wrong?" The blonde shook his head slowly.

"Mhm tired, sensei."

"What happened out there?" Naruto cringed slightly at the direct tone.

"Eh, just lost my balance and fell…Musta hit my head kinda hard too, huh?" And there was that annoying grin. Fake. Just like his laugh and the cheerfulness he replicated in another's presence. He lamely scratched his head in unease as the man stared him down, eyes not reflecting the false humor.

"Stop lying and tell me what happened. I don't like being taken for a fool, Naruto." The teen's eyes turned cold and restless once more.

"You wouldn't care, even if I did tell you." His voice lashed out accusingly, and Iruka could no longer see the blue in the boy's averted gaze. "You really don't understand that they've already tried what you're doing and, once upon a time, it worked."

"…tried what?"

"Dammit, don't play dumb! Don't act like you care, cause… cause…" He fought around for a moment for the right words to express the phrase he suddenly didn't want to utter, then gave up entirely. "Cause it always hurts more in the end," he whispered. "I was fine. I would've gotten up and moved on. I always do." He fingered the bruises against his skin, wondering indolently where his jacket and shirt had gone. The scarred man sighed, his patience wearing thin.

"And you. Don't believe that I haven't seen you, noticed you…the way you sway when you walk, the way you can't even run without wearing out…" He buried his face in his hands. "Don't think I didn't see how much weight you lost, that I didn't feel how light you were." His ribs… Gods…. How long had he been like that? This wasn't all something that had sprung up in the last five days…

"I-"

"It was my fault though, wasn't it? I didn't know, and you tried to tell me." He laughed, no sign of amusement in his stony voice. "You only eat at the academy, don't you? And I took even that away from you…" So, where did the boy eat on the weekends, the holidays? But he didn't ask. He was afraid of the answer the thirteen year old might give him.

"…You didn't do that on purpose?"

"Dammit, no!" Naruto looked into the fabric of the couch he had propped himself up on. Suddenly the design was so much more interesting than looking into the other man's hurt face.

"It doesn't matter then."

"It does too!" Iruka shoved his hands against the younger boy's shoulders, pinning him to the sofa and forcing his gaze into the cold icy depths… "Stop hiding behind your smile and just…just get it out…" He dropped his voice lower. "Just get out what you've been wanting to tell us all these years."

Naruto laughed, cold and pressing. So unfeeling that it sent shivers up and down the man's spine.

"That's a first. Asking me what I have to say. Nothing. Not to you, not to any one of those selfish people out there. Let me ask you though. There's something on your mind. Is there something you wish to say?"

Iruka looked up and mimicked the boy's own grin for a fraction of a second.

"As a matter of fact, there is."

"Well, you better get it out now," he growled. And he did.

"What the hell were you doing in the teacher's bathing house at four in the fucking morning?" Iruka had obviously thrown his last nerve into suicide, but it didn't faze the teen at all.

"I could ask you the same question. What kinda loser gets up that early?"

"Let me remind you that you also looked decently awake at the time. Unless you can pick locks while sleep walking?"

Naruto grinned impishly.

"Never mind. I don't think I want to know what you've gotten yourself into in the past. The fact of the matter is you know damn well that that's no place for you to be, or you wouldn't have been there so damn early."

"They…cut my water… my electricity. You know… not making rent and all…"

The response was so unpredicted and downright honest that it took the man a second to realize what the boy had said.

"You live by yourself in an apartment?" What a stupid question. Who else would the boy be living with? He had no family to speak of, no friends… no money. Maybe he should have spent a little more time to think it through. He tried once more. "Why don't you try doing what the rest of us have to do, and get a job?"

The boy snarled.

"You don't think I've tried? Now who do you think would even _consider_ hiring me?"

"Well, maybe if you weren't so…" the man searched around for the right word… "destructive…"

Naruto laughed bitterly.

"Don't act like you don't see it, _sensei._ The way that people look at me, talk to me…_You_ should know it pretty well yourself."

And he did. Hadn't he also judged the boy too soon? Hadn't he thought it impossible that the child could be anyone else other than the destructive teen who pulled pranks and got into trouble every day? He sighed. Again.

"So what have you been doing up until now then? Something's kept you going for all these years…"

"Why the hell should you care?"

"It's a curiosity matter, really. So?"

The boy looked to the ground and muttered something barely audible.

"Come again?"

When the teen looked up, the regret was evident in his pale blue eyes.

"I…I had to do it… No one would give me a job. I never went after anyone like myself though. Just the people who could afford to lose it…"

"You stole?"

He nodded, the growing lump in his throat too painful to speak around.

"Then why couldn't you just steal some food? Obviously it's not a matter of stealth for you if you've been at it this long. Food here isn't as precious as silver or gold."

The blonde's response floored the man once again.

"I promised myself I wouldn't steal more than I had to just to get by."

"But you would have starved to death!"

"You revoked my privileges for three weeks. I figured I could get by with the apple you gave me before, and I could always ask Sakura if I _had_ to…"

How could so many people be so wrong about a character? How could they have all missed such morality in him? …but then again, Iruka had to admit that he himself had been fooled as well. Fooled by a smile, a laugh, and by a mere boy who sat alone and ate alone, and watched the world pass him by without a second glance.

"That's it," he said with blunt finality.

Naruto looked up, doubt and distrust etched into every defining line of his body.

"What now?"

"Come by my classroom tomorrow afternoon around midday. I'll give you a job."

Silence, and then in barely a whisper…

"Why?"

"You're my student, and it would look rather extreme on my record if you were to pass out either from lack of food or descent sleep on my watch."

Naruto's face visibly hardened, and the faint whisper of hope that had played in his eyes, blown away by an invisible wind of hurt.

_Why can't I just say it? Why can't I tell him that it's because I care about him as a person? That I don't see him anymore as the monster that is his secret burden?_

"Of course," was all the boy voiced, turning to leave the house.

"Naruto." He spun around, eyes widening ever so slightly as the chuunin tilted his head to the side and smiled. A true smile. For him alone. "Let me treat you to some ramen before you go, okay?"

He nodded, the corners of his lips turning up in true contentment. "I'd like that."

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**A/n- Hey guys! What'd you think? Hate it? Love it? Should I leave it here, or should I finish up? I'd LOVE to hear what you have to say, and btw, I'm hoping to make my goal of a certain amount of reviews, so make me happy! (And I shall reward you greatly with your choice of donut…and some mashed taters with brown gravy. Yum. ;-) lol, just thought you might find it interesting, but I was eating ramen nonstop the whole time I wrote this ficcy. :-p Okay, not all, but for most of it.**

-Lexi (The evil twin)


	2. Nothing to Gain

**A/n- Hey guy! Just wanted to say THANKS FOR THE GREAT REVIEWS! REALLY inspiring, so keep 'em up! Sorry this is so short. I love you like a passionate duckling on LSD! ;-)**

**Enjoy!

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**

**Disclaimer- Now that I think of it, I DO like Sasuke just a little bit better. Kakashi's hot though. And Iruka! Oh, and I don't own their hot bodies. I re watched the 3rd episode, and Naruto's scene in the bathroom was kinda…not welcomed while I was eating.

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**Chapter 2**

**Nothing to Lose

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A small hand paused tentatively a mere breath away from the brass handle of the door. Truth be told, the blonde had only used it a couple times upon entering the classroom; a more dramatic entrance through the window or vents was by far more suitable to the boy's personality. So why the hesitation?

He knew what it was. Knew _exactly_ why he couldn't find the strength to open the damn door. And he growled at the stupidity of it all.

Iruka-sensei would not be waiting for him on the other side.

How many times had he been in this same position, just different faces? Different excuses?

_"Sorry, Naruto. Something just came up."_

He snarled, his face scrunching up in fox-like anger. His upper lip curled over white canines, lengthening in response to his growing rage.

_"Naruto, some friends came over. Maybe next time."_

His fingers slowly turned white as he gripped the brass doorknob as if it represented all of the people he hated. Who couldn't spare a moment after class to talk to him. Help him. The worst kind of liars; the pretenders.

_"Ah, Naruto. I just forgot."_

"Damn it!" He slammed down on the brass handle, flinging the door open wide.

_"Naruto, I-"_

Iruka raised his head from the hand he had propped it on while sorting through some file or other, taken completely by surprise.

"Oh, Naruto." He let out the breath he had sucked in over the duration of the sudden arrival. "Why don't you come over here so we can get started. Nice to see you're on time for once." The man smiled and relaxed, but the blonde stood rooted on the spot, staring unbelievingly at the chuunin behind the desk, who raised an eyebrow inquiringly at the silent blonde. "Naruto?"

"…You…came?"

"Yeah…said I would, didn't I?"

"So then, why?"

"Why what?"

"Why are you here?"

"…Didn't we just go over this yesterday?" The man matched his student's rapid pace, not yet catching the pattern of speech, but patiently waiting for the boy to reach a point.

"That's not what I mean. Why did you show up today?" he demanded hotly.

"I thought I explained it thoroughly last night," he coughed slightly. "… while you were unsuccessfully sneaking the ramen from my bowl into yours, I might add. The job I proposed-"

"Oh," the teen breathed out softly. Then an even more hushed, "Thanks."

"Sure. Everyone's saying that I should hire someone to help me out here. It's disaster, these headache the papers give me." The man tapped his skull to enrich his statement.

Naruto didn't bother to explain that his gratitude expanded far beyond just the job. The man had come. Had _showed up_ to do something giving for him when he had done nothing to deserve it…

He stopped short of reaching the desk, frozen to the ground once more.

"Naruto?" The man frowned in concern, standing up from his chair, but not moving forward. "Maybe we should pick this up another time… If you're feeling a little off today, I can understand-"

"I can't pay you."

The man's frown deepened in bewilderment.

"Isn't that my job?"

"I don't have anything to give you in return, so you can't punish me for not returning payment…" It took all the man's resolve not to let his empathy manifest on his features. Knowing the kid like he did, it would be interpreted as pity; an emotion that was never to be perceptible, lest it be thoroughly and utterly misjudged. When had this thirteen year old grown so ancient? When did he learn that in order to survive, he had to constantly remain on the defense? Iruka swallowed the lump that seemed to have lodged itself in is throat, the corners of his mouth lifting at a sadly failing attempt at a smile.

"Well, that's good, because I expect you to do your hardest on the job. That's the deal, right?" When the boy refused to answer, the man continued. "Well, you'll have an assortment of odd jobs around here, really. I'm not just giving you money for free. There's hardly just one thing that needs to be done, so why don't you help me finish up these papers?" Naruto's head shot up to look directly into his eyes.

"You would… trust me to _grade_ papers?" Iruka winced slightly.

Well, actually, no. That was the last thing the man wanted his student to be doing. He had to suppress a shudder at the thought. If Naruto graded the papers, half the academy would be wrongly flunked. He was thinking more along the lines of the kid recording attendance's. Maybe it might encourage him to do it a little more often himself-

"Sensei?" _Damn it, I'm gunna be up all night rechecking his work._

"Of course." He smiled at the boy who grinned happily back. "All you have to do is match up their answers with the ones on the answer sheet here." He handed the blonde a couple of stapled pages filled with the results of the tests.

Naruto took the pile in a shaking hand, an unreadable expression implanted in his features.

"So, why don't you finish those up, and we'll call it a day, okay? I'm rather tired, and we can work a little more tomorrow, yeah?"

Naruto nodded distractedly in response, already scanning through the list. "…yeah."

.o.

Iruka hadn't realized that he'd fallen asleep yet again over the stack of papers Naruto had graded earlier that day… until he woke with a rather demanding hankering for caffeine. Already over halfway through re reading the scores, Iruka was impressed at the boy's restraint from completely mauling everyone's work. With exception to the evil bloodthirsty raccoon chewing a human skull with hair that looked (just slightly) like the Uchiha kid's hair that Naruto had sketched onto the right hand corner of one of his classmate's papers, the results were more or less honest and image-free. The boy was a hard worker when he put his mind and heart to it. So why then, would he go out of his way to fail? It irked the man to no end.

The chuunin rubbed his eyes tiredly before standing up and stretching. Maybe it was time that he trusted the blonde haired youth a little more, and left the rest of the tests unchecked to hand back tomorrow. _Or, _he thought, grinning smartlyas the truth really hit him,_maybe it was just time to head back to his house to get some damn sleep, and use Naruto's flash of morality as an excuse to not finish looking over the rest of the papers._ He smiled to himself as he stepped out of the classroom and back out into the cool night. There was no wind, no whisper of life to stir the standing cold that lit his every breath into a fine mist. The moon was beginning to wane, creeping in on itself until, in a couple more nights, it would be nothing more than a dark outline in the sky. At least now it was enough to highlight the path…

Iruka stopped dead in his tracks. At first he was unsure of what had frozen him to the spot so suddenly, but it didn't take long to make out the distinct sound of human breathing only a little to his left…

"Naruto?" he whispered at the small form curled in a ball against the cold of the nighta little ways from the lone rope swing. Maybe they should take that swing down…nobody ever used it nowadays anyway…

He walked silently forward and reached out, stroking the blonde's cheek tenderly, and the child's mouth parted gently into a soft smile. He smiled back in response, knowing full well there would be nobody there to witness it, then turned around, walking back the way he had come.

.o.

Blue eyes flickered open, and in an instant, slammed shut again.

"Fuuuuuck…" Came the mind-blowingly intelligent response to the situation. Waking up on the verge of passing out again on the incredibly uncomfortable ground with a massive bitch of a headache was more than a little shocking to him. How the hell did he manage to get _here?_ He sighed in defeat, (exasperation, he corrected himself. Uzumaki Naruto was _never_ defeated… maybe slammed into the ground by a rabid Sakura sometimes, but never defeated.) and snuggled closer into the surrounding warmth.

What the flying ramen noodles? Warmth? What could _possibly_ manage to be warm in the damp grass?

Loosing the futile struggle against his mind urging him to go back to sleep (which he wholeheartedly agreed with), Naruto opened his eyes once more, sitting up and rubbing the grit from his face.

Something a faded forest green color more or less dropped from his shoulders to the ground with a rather unattractive thump.

…A jacket? He lifted it closer to his face for inspection, identifying it as the clothing that classed the higher jounin and chuunin ninjas.

"…Iruka sensei…" Naruto took a minute to mentally thank the man, cause he sure as hell wouldn't do it aloud, then instantly began delving through the pockets, his wild grin in place. Really now, if the guy was stupid enough to leave a jacket on him, it was his own fault that the items it contained would be missing in the morning, right?

The rough texture that met his fingers was not the treasure he had been expecting. He pulled it out and eyed it carefully. A piece of bread? The boy's face softened as his elongated search brought forth similar results. When he was sure the clothing was completely empty, (he had even checked the lining, just to be sure) a small stash of consumable provisions lay at his side. He gnawed at the end of a strip of jerky, then stood up, not knowing what to think. Really, he wasn't expected to work with Iruka-sensei for another two hours, but with nothing better to do, he made his way back to the small classroom, and hesitantly opened the door.

Iruka looked up from his desk, took in the ruffle-haired and dirty state his pupil was in, then grinned madly.

"Sleep well, Naruto?" The boy glared at him and rubbed the back of his aching neck.

"Yeah, yeah, shut up, sensei." They stared at each other for some time before Iruka's gaze softened.

"I had a talk with your landlord, Naruto."

"You did _what?_" The incredulous look the teen shot at him almost hurt the man, but he sighed and smiled lightly instead.

"It's been cleared up, and you can go back now, if you wish."

"You… _paid my debt?_" The unreadable look Naruto was scrutinizing him with made the man uneasy. Had he been wrong to assume?

"Well, no, not really. We just talked it out, and I told her about your situation and all and how you-"

"Don't fucking lie to me, sensei. I'm not a kid anymore," he snarled back.

_But you are, Naruto. You just don't see it, _he thought desperately. Then aloud,"It wasn't anything big, really." He waved it off indifferently.

"I told you before, I have nothing to pay you with." The smile on his lips dropped instantly.

"And I told _you_ before, that's why you're working here. Besides, this is free. A small gift to you from me, if you will." Somehow, a smile seemed to fit so well here, but he knew the kid would see right through it. Damn him.

"I know you don't just want someone to file papers for you, sensei." He looked sideways at the ground…anywhere but into his teacher's eyes when he spoke next. "Do you want," he faltered, voice hitching on his barely audible and shameful words. "…my body?"

He heard the startled gasp from the corner of the room where Iruka had just dropped the pen he had been holding. Hands slammed down on the desk, and the chair was shoved away forcibly.

"Sensei, I-" why did these words sound so raw on his tongue? Everyone else had taken advantage of this..."It's only payment, so it won't change anything." Suddenly, he found himself rambling. Something that he so often did, but itnever so honestly _him._ "Just, don't do 'nuthin I can't explain if people ask. Kyuubi helps me heal faster, but please…just don't use any kinda poison or 'nuthin that'll damage me too bad, k? I dun wanna have to-"

"Hey, look at me." Blue eyes snapped up, then slammed shut as the teen cringed when a hand closed the distance between the two.

"Not till I finish working!" he growled out. "You can't hurt me till I've done the job." He lowered his voice, almost despairingly. "Don't hit me yet. Please." The hand paused for a fraction of a second, before cupping the back of the boy's neck. He flinched and backed up a step, only to be stopped by the pressure of the hand.

"Wasn't going to," Iruka whispered, drawing Naruto into his chest.

Blue eyes shot open wide. He shuddered violently in the suddenly tight embrace, shivering utterly out of control as the man spoke softly and comfortingly into his hair.

"Relax. It's just a hug," he murmured. Small fists reached up to grab handfuls of the man's clothing, skin catching in the boy's grasp, but somehow…it was okay.

"Why?" he managed to choke out through harsh uneven gasps. The scarred chuunin chuckled deep in his throat, and then frowned once more as the realization struck him.

"You've never been hugged by anyone before, have you?"

Naruto's knees gave way, buckling under his weight, but the man was already lowering them both to the ground. He released the dazed boy and sat back on his heels at a crouch, elbows resting slack on his knees.

"Well, Naruto, now you have."

And suddenly… it was okay… to just cry.

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**A/n- Did I disappoint anyone? I was not too happy with this chapter… I completely mauled the ending which was so sweet before I MADE it the ending. (It WAS gunna be the beginning) Things WILL get better if I type up another chapter. So I need more votes for pairings! (Relationship, or just a Father/son?)**

**Any ideas on where this should go? It's up to you all!  
.:shakes can of reviews:.**

**Review please! (And I'll love you like a fiery passionate potsticker on LSD)**

And thanks to **Ilovenerds** (I think that's it, right? I have to go off memory here) for trying to do my VERY FIRST fiction artwork! You get TWO donuts:-) And you rock my pink polkadotted socks! YEAH, GO YOU!

-I think I'll be Luna for today. :-)


	3. Nothing to Love

**Disclaimer-**I like cherries. I also like riding my horses and- OMG, I LOVE MY HORSES! It would be so sexy if I could ride my horses with Naruto…  
Being dragged alongin the dust, while stupidly dodging well placed GORGEOUS hooves. .:gush gush:. .:gush gush:.

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Chapter 3  
Nothing to Love

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**A/n- Many thanks to JYue for the AWESOME support you've shown me (I'll get back to you soon. :-D), IloveNerds, for the AMAZING artwork, which I'll display in my profile shortly, (Go check it out, guys! Pcha!), and then Black Velvet Poison, who's fan fictions without a doubt far surpass my own. I HIGHLY recommend and encourage you all to go to her LJ, and read them all! (Just don't forget about me, guys!) And to all my other reviewers, THANKS SO MUCH! I love you all, and all your input has been GREAT and VERY helpful! Muah!**

**Last note for now, I promise! Please read my A/N at the end of the chappy. Its kinda important to me. .:smiles:.**

**Enjoy.**

**.o.**

"It's a mission, Naruto." Iruka leaned over the bowl of ramen he hadn't so much as touched yet, not even attempting to conceal the depth of worry in his eyes. "And I'm concerned that it's going to be harder than you seem to believe." How many more bowls of ramen would it take to get his point through to that teen's thick blonde skull?

"I'm not a kid anymore, sensei," the boy growled in annoyance once more through stuffed cheeks, swallowing just in time for his next statement. "So don't treat me like one."

"But you're my student." _But not for long, _his traitorous mind voiced off indiscriminately. It had a point though, Iruka mused dejectedly. Not that he was going to tell Naruto that any time soon. His gaze was steady and serious, one of the few times he allowed himself the privilege. Frown lines make wrinkles. Wrinkles make red flags of invitation for snarky Naruto comments.

Naruto snorted, pulling his sensei's bowl towards himself as he started slurping it down as well.

"Old man, if I couldn't handle a single mission," he paused for a moment while noisily draining the liquid from the bowl. "…weighed down by two morons and a _jounin,"_ He grabbed his chopsticks, fishing around for noodles, "…who can jump in at any moment to rescue our sorry asses if we get caught," hovering the bowl directly over his abnormally wide mouth to catch the remaining drops, Naruto frowned pathetically when nothing more came out. "…not that _I_ will be, but for the others' sakes, then there ain't gunna ever be a chance for me to become Hokage!" he finished triumphantly, slamming the bowl down next to his own, very much to the manager's disapproval.

Iruka knew he was right. Knew he was more than ready for his first mission, and that was why he watched the boy jump from his stool and stride away without another word of protest. Why he had especially arranged for the kid to be Kakashi's student for the mission. No one guarded their team members so fiercely then that very man. He smiled, if only because he had done the best he could.

"Take care, Naruto," he whispered into the wind. Maybe he didn't know it, but for once, the child had someone who cared. Someone he could come back to and relive the day's story with over a bowl of ramen. Someone who worried if he would arrive home safely from bloody missions.

"Why don't you just tell him, then?" The large ramen server peered down at the chuunin who still hadn't taken his eyes from the direction Naruto had run off into.

"What?" The dazed and vacant expression turned to the man behind the counter who indifferently washed the inside of one of the cups with a dirtying rag.

"Tell him what he's been wanting to hear all these years; what's been on your mind for some time now." He shrugged his broad shoulders and turned away to serve his arriving customers. "Unless you're content to continue buying ramen every day for your 'just a student'."

Iruka sighed miserably, his chin cupped in his hands once more as he turned his gaze back to the path his student had taken.

"… I think you're right…" _Too right._

.o.

This wasn't right. This was only supposed to be a D ranked mission. Hardly a mission at all, wasn't that what Kakashi sensei had told them himself? But Kakashi sensei wasn't anywhere around as far as he could see, which wasn't very far, given the thick fog that surrounded them. Hunting someone's lost pet down, even if it was beyond their own territory, shouldn't have resulted in their near death.

-BFB-

"_Damn it, Naruto, stop fucking bleeding!"_

"_Sasuke?"_

"_Yeah, it's me you loser. Hold still."_

"_But, your leg-"_

"_Is doing just fine. You should be more worried about your shoulder and ever moving that arm again."_

_He had laughed._

"_I've had worse."_

"_Why did you do that, you moron?"_

-BFB-

"Sasuke!" His thoughts came to an abrupt halt as a single voice cut through the damp air. Sakura? She was okay? "Please, Sasuke, answer me!" Naruto let out a sigh of relief. Her voice was still so far off, but her pleas into the silence carried ages of worry. He squinted his eyes, trying to find her form through the heavy mist.

"Naruto?" He jerked his head around to stare at the boy, still his rival till the end, sitting on the cold ground behind him, his leg stretched out in front of him, a blossoming of crimson staining the makeshift bandage around it.

"Sasuke." He nodded, not sure whether the teen could see him or not.

"We should go look for her, you know. Sensei as well." His voice was grave, more so then normal, and it pleased the blonde inside to no end. To know that the great Sasuke Uchiha wasn't as fearless as he put up to be, though admittedly more so than Naruto himself. The prick.

"I know. You can walk?" He tried to grin, to maintain that slim grasp of comfort it had offered him in the past, wanting to share the illusion of warmth with the boy behind him.

"Slowly. Go ahead, I'll follow behind you. Just call out often, so I know where you are."

And he did.

Minutes can turn into hours, into ages, into forever, when you're walking blindly towards something you can't perceive. The one comfort the swirling mist offered was not knowing where you were. Convincing himself that he was really walking back home to a steaming cup of ramen and a smiling face, (whose, he wasn't sure) only encouraged him to walk faster. And faster. And faster, till he was nearly running headlong into his teammates.

"Sakura!" Naruto waved energetically at the figure that could only be his female partner. And behind her, fairing just as well as the lively teen, Kakashi walked stiffly forward, the unfortunate remains of the cat they had been chasing held firmly to his chest.

"Sasuke!" The girl began to run towards them, the tears she had been crying evident even in her desperate voice. It was okay that she hadn't called for him, not once, but Naruto held out his arms for a comforting hug she could run into. That's what girls liked anyway, wasn't it? Comfort, or something like that? Hm, he didn't have any chocolate with him at the moment for her, and he'd be damned if he was gunna pick flowers for her in _this_ situation. He searched his pockets, until at last, his fingertips brushed up against something tangible…

Did girls like cheese?

The blonde shook his head. It was about a week old, anyway, so he settled for opening his arms out to her wider.

"Hah! Sakura! I knew you'd make it out and I'm so glad you're okay, so why don't you come over here and we can make sure that you're not hurt or anything and let me look you over just in case you might have missed a spot or something and maybe you can come check me out to make sure that I'm all okay too, which I'm sure that I'll be once you look me over really well and-"

"You're always in the way, Naruto!" She screamed as she brushed past him, running towards the shadow that had limped along behind him all this time.

"But Sakura, are you really okay, cause I was getting kinda of worried for you and all-"

"Sasuke! What happened to your leg? Here, do you need help standing up? You can always lean on me, you know, and-"

"Stupid girl." She flinched at the cold words, but didn't move.

"It's okay, I'm sure you'll be just fine, Sasuke. We'll get you home in one piece, I promise, but-"

"You should be thanking Naruto, not gushing over me, _Sakura._"

"But- but you're the one that's hurt…"

"Damn it, did you even _look_ at him? He," the dark haired teen lowered his voice so only Sakura could catch the few guilty words he uttered. "He saved me."

She looked back at the orange clad figure still standing in the middle of the road, still trying to force his trademark grin into place. But it was slipping.

"Naw, really, it's okay Sakura! I'm just fine, see? I'm walking and I'm talking, but why don't you come over here and give me a big hug, cause I promise I won't do anything bad!"

"You're so noisy, Naruto. But at least you're good for something." She looked tenderly back down at the boy in her arms. "At least Sasuke's alright now…"

And suddenly it was too much to take in a day. In a lifetime. With a silence unnatural to his being, Naruto disappeared into the lifting fog. The only evidence of his departure was the small gust of wind that brushed past Kakashi, who had regarded the entire exchange of both words and feelings silently over the top of his infamous book. Perhaps this was a little more than the expected typical teenage drama and angst?

.o.

"You know, Sakura-"

"I know, sensei, I said I'd apologize, and I really am sorry, it's just that, you know Naruto… he's just always so…so…" She shrugged, unable to justify her point any further with words alone.

"Different?" the masked jounin offered quietly, looking at the girl walking next to him with his one unhidden eye. But she shook her head.

"No, I don't know _what_ it is… I like him, but then I don't. He's so damn _infuriating_ some times!" She stomped her foot, her eyes blazing in familiar anger. Instead of answering, the jounin pointed to the cluster of buildings and houses a little ways down the path.

"Is that it?" Sakura nodded, then sighed as she spotted the particular apartment door that belonged solely to Naruto. It wasn't hard to miss, with the door wide open and random trash spread out around the entrance. As they neared the building, Kakashi stooped to pluck one of the crushed items from the floor.

"Well, it seems you've really managed to hit his sensitive spot this time, Sakura." He shook the leaking cup of uncooked ramen in front of the girl, smiling behind his mask as he leaned down to her level, one hand planted firmly on his hip like an accusing parent to a disobedient child. She looked from the cup, and then back to the man, quirking an eyebrow in perplexity.

"Ramen, sensei?"

The man threw the cup over his shoulder, (nearly hitting the silent Sasuke in the head), and walked on. "Naruto? Waste ramen?" he looked back at the pink haired female, tilting his head to the side as he mirrored Naruto's exasperating tone. "Believe it." Sakura giggled as the jounin slipped up the stairs to lean against the doorway. He sighed dramatically loud and lulled his head to the side, observing the inside of the apartment without interest.

"Gee, Naruto, why, we most certainly had the time of our lives trudging through the incredible mess you left-" he choked off, nearly slipping off the doorframe in a most undignified manner. "_Shit_ _Naruto!_"

Sakura and Sasuke hastened to peer around their sensei into the darkened apartment room, and the pink haired girl withheld a scream.

The room was trashed. Illuminated only by various burning objects, broken glass and ripped clothing littered the ground while what appeared to once have been a desk smoldered silently in the corner, drops of the dousing water still dripping hazardously to the floor in a growing puddle. And all around them, cans and bottles of a deep red paint stained the wooden floors.

"Oh, hey, sensei. Sakura." The teen waved with one hand, forcing a smile onto his face as he leaned to pick up an article of clothing with his other hand.

"Naruto, what the _hell_ happened here?" Kakashi's grim gaze took in the state of chaos the room was in. Bright graffiti screamed their profound and hurtful messages across every wall, every mirror and table, the still wet fluids casting a drip effect under each vivid letter. At first he had thought it was blood, but the horrible words turned a shade of red darker than that of the feared liquid as his eyes adjusted to the darkness. Scanning the room for a light switch, the man gave up, even as he found the panel he was searching for. It was no use. All the bulbs in the lamps and the lights had been smashed to pieces underfoot by whoever had been here before them. His keen eye picked out the dulled colors of old markings that had long been scrubbed away, the heart wrenching evidence that this wasn't the first time such horrors had taken place here.

Naruto smiled again, discarding the obviously valueless rag that might have once been his sleeping clothes into a corner. Touching the wet paint on the wall that advertised a selection of profound and wounding phrases, he turned to face his group.

"Naruto?" Sakura took a step forward, reaching out as if to touch him, then letting her hand drop to her side.

"Hey, it's okay guys! It happens all the time!" He grinned and waved a burnt blanket out of his way in his search for anything whole. Anything that had not been touched by fire or paint. Anything that had not been smashed to bits against the cold floor. "I just didn't expect them to go this far this time, that's all! Really, nothing I can't handle, honestly!"

"Naruto, that's not the point!" Tears bridged in Sakura's eyes, her hands clenched into fists tightly against her chest. Somehow, he liked having her cry for him. Having her worry for him and possibly even his safety. It felt good, but at the same time, it hurt to see her in pain. It hurt to see her crying when she should really be smiling. Sometimes, it was okay to be hurt himself, so long as she was laughing. "Please, Naruto. We want to help. Who did this?" She looked at him tearfully, and he winced.

"Well, actually…I really don't know quite who- ah _shit!_ Stupid mirror!" In a whirl of black and red, Sasuke was instantly at his partner's side to support him before he fell. A flowing line of blood tricked down the blonde's arm and soaked into his already stained and dirty orange jacket as he glared daggers at the fragment of the shattered mirror that still clung to the broken frame. "Man, I _knew_ I shouldn't have bought that thing, and Iruka-sensei told me that if I ever broke one of them that it would be seven years bad luck, but I thought that was only because I kept breaking all the glass around the classroom, but then again I should have been paying more attention because Iruka-sensei is always right, but don't tell him I said that, cause I'll never hear the end of it, and I mean, what's _with_ that man, cause I thought only girls wore their hair in freakin' ponytails, I mean, come on already! I-"

"Naruto." Kakashi looked straight at his student, as if trying to find something in his blue eyes that wasn't there before. "If you want to say something, say it."

The boy paused, his grin faltering, but only for a second…

"Uh, sensei, I don't have a clue what you're saying, but-"

"It's okay to be upset, Naruto. It's only human. We're not going to judge you if you need to…" _Cry. Break down. Hurt. Hate. Anything but that same damn smile we can all see right through. _"Say or feel something… uh… or you know…just 'lose it' or something." The room went deadly silent, a strange cold seeping in through their veins.

"I'm not a baby anymore, sensei, and I don't need to be coddled like one either." He sighed, his light smile back in place. "I'd really like it if you, you know, _left._ Like, right now."

And to his amazement, the jounin backed out without a word. Sasuke threw him one last emotionless look before he shrugged and let go of Naruto's arm, silently following his trainer out the door. It was okay with Sasuke, and the blonde was internally grateful to him. The other teen knew and could understand how he felt now. The sudden need to be alone...

"Um, Sakura… could you come here for just a sec? I promise it'll be quick…" Naruto blushed slightly as she nearly tripped over herself to stand by his side, looking down at the ground when she finally arrived in front of him.

"I just-"

"Oh, Naruto, I know you're probably _really_ mad at me right now, but that's why we all came here in the first place was so that I could apologize to you, but I never expected something like this to-"

"Um, Sakura?" She blinked.

"Yeah?"

"My arm. Please, do you think you could let it go? I don't think I can feel it anymore…"

"Ah! Sorry, Naruto!" He was rather sorry he had said anything when she dropped the arm she had been clutching painfully hard as if it had turned to fire.

"It's okay, really. Actually, what I wanted to say was, well, you know, since I'm going to be moving and all…" He swallowed hard, reaching into his pocket for the small piece of scratch paper he had scribbled on. "I wrote down my new address for you, you know, just if…"

**.:FLASHBACK:.**

"…_just if you ever feel like you want to hang out with me sometime, or if you ever,_ ever_ just need a place where you can feel safe. Please, don't ever worry about where you have to sleep or what you're going to eat that night. My door's always locked, but just knock, and I'll always be there to open it, okay?"_

**.:END FLASHBACK:.**

He had spoken the very same words over seven times since they had first met. She had always laughed it off, throwing it carelessly into the nearest trash bin, forgetting all about the slip of paper with his new addresses written neatly on it with never so much as a glance. She hadn't known at that time that he had spent hours practicing the writing so that it would look perfect. Clean and neat. Had he moved all those times for this very same reason? She had never thought about it before, but had he really been alone for all of these years? What child should ever live in the fear of his home being destroyed, and possibly even himself in the process, with no one he could feel safe going to? No one to tell him that everything was going to be alright?

"Naruto…" He smiled at her, handing her the piece of paper that even now was written in perfect kanji, so unlike his everyday scribbles. She took it, folding it up and placing it in her pocket. Maybe someday she would actually visit him just to say hi. She had never done that before. He must have been so lonely…

"Anyway, that's all, really! So, I guess I'll see you tomorrow in training, huh?"

She gave him her own watery smile, and turned to walk out the door.

"Yeah, I guess so. Thanks, Naruto." He waved to her back, not sure if she knew he had done so, and waited until the darkness of the falling night consumed her form before he allowed his grin to fade. Why was it starting to hurt more and more every time he smiled?

.o.

"So, what is it, Kakashi sensei?" Sakura peered at the two scrolls crisscrossed on the dirt ground only a little ways from the ruined apartment where the boy inside still attempted to salvage usable or meaningful belongings.

"It's a summoning scroll, one apparently meant to summon a person. They're used mainly on missions in times of need, most often to call upon the village Hokage when the situations become uncontrollable." Surprisingly, it wasn't Kakashi that had answered, but the shadow of a boy who leaned against the nearest tree, soundlessly watching the preparation.

"Is it true, sensei?" The man laughed lightly, sparing her a brief glance before spreading two drops of blood from the small wound he had obtained during the mission over both scrolls.

"More or less. This one doesn't have near the importance of the Hokage, and I believe is completely more bothersome and rather annoyingly obsessive, but," he sighed, "This is necessary." He rolled his one eye, muttering almost inaudibly, "I hate calling for backup."

"Backup, sensei?"

But the man was already too deep into producing the correct hand seals to respond. Or maybe he just didn't want to.

Sasuke had to clamp a tight hand over Sakura's mouth to stifle her cry of laughter when the figure finally appeared, clad only in a pair of boxers sporting…hearts and smiley faces? His own eyes laughed noiselessly as the man looked stupidly around himself, blushing a deep shade of red. Kakashi grinned and waved.

"Well, hey there! What a… surprise!"

"Damn it Kakashi! The summoning scrolls are to be used ONLY FOR EMERGENCIES! This better be REALLY _HELL_ important! I could have been showering! Or… in the middle of some very personal moments with someone close to me or something-"

"Save it, Iruka. We all know you don't have a girlfriend."

"BECAUSE YOU _STOLE_ HER!" he screamed, obviously not in the best of moods.

"Still sore? Anyway, that wasn't why I called you out here… Naruto's in there." He pointed at the trashed doorway to the boy's apartment. Iruka's expression sharpened in an instant, concern and fear evident in his eyes.

"Is he okay?" He finally looked the man up and down, taking in the state of chaos in the clothing of the people around him, darkened with sweat and blood from earlier that day. "Oh, shit!" he groaned, heart beating faster. " He had his first mission today, didn't he? He better be okay, or I swear I'm going to make you-"

"He's fine, Iruka," the jounin managed to utter disinterestedly between the other man's outbursts. "Or at least, he is physically. I think you should talk to him."

"Why'd you call me then? Surely if talking was all you needed, there's no doubt that you could have easily provided that and much more," he snapped back.

"Because, Iruka." He sighed. "You're the only one who _can_ honestly talk to him. I can't. I don't think anybody can, but he trusts you." He rolled his eyes. "Goddess know _why_ though."

"About what?" He sent an incredulous look at the masked teacher.

"You'll see. Be a good ninja, and just be there for him like you always are, and you should be fine." He huffed a little, snapping open his infamous book and scanning the pages. "Keep your panties on. No need to get them all tied in a knot over this." And in the next instant he was gone, the two others with him in a swirl of leaves and trash.

Damn it. He hated when the guy did that. How rude.

Iruka sighed, focussing on the problem at hand as he slowly walked towards and then through the doorway…

"Oh, _shit_, Naruto!"

Kakashi smirked from the branch of the tree he was perched on, a hand wrapped around both of his student's mouths on each side of him. Breathing out a jutsu to amplify the voices inside, the man snickered helplessly. And wasn't this unraveling drama more interesting than reading his written porn at the moment.

There was silence for a moment inside the apartment, and then-

"Um, Iruka-sensei? What happened to your, um… clothes?" There was a slight cough, and a muttered,

"Never mind that. They did it again, huh?"

So he had known about all the other times as well? Kakashi had to hand it to the man. Here he was, thinking the guy had worked some sort of mystical jutsu on the boy to make him like him. Psht. So much for juicy information. He barely caught the last exchange of words as the pair walked back outside, Iruka ruffling the blonde's already wild hair.

"Do you need some help hauling stuff to your new apartment?" he offered. "I can carry some of your things if you need."

"Naw, it's okay sensei, really. I don't own much anyway." He raised the small grocery bag full of the small trinkets and clothing he had recovered. His only possessions.

For a moment, both of his teacher's hearts skipped a beat in sympathy, but the boy didn't seem to notice, still walking until Iruka spoke up again, scratching the back of his head with a grin.

"Hell, you want a piggyback ride then, kid?"

"…a… what?" Iruka-sensei seemed thrilled at his chance to change the topic.

"Come on, then. Just get on my back, and I'll give you a lift to you're apartment."

"You mean like the shameless parents around town do for their three year old daughters?" An eyebrow raised slightly as he looked his teacher in the eye.

"Exactly!" The man laughed, and Naruto couldn't help but really smiling.

"No thanks sensei… it'd be a bit awkward explaining to everyone what I'm doing riding on the back of a half naked man through town in the middle of the night. I'm thinking that's gotta be breaking a couple laws, so, tempting as it may be, no thanks."

The two of them laughed outright as Iruka nodded in defeat, snaking an arm around the teen's shoulders and drawing him in close. Naruto froze for a second, then relaxed into the hug as they walked down the dark path.

"You're so stupid it's funny, Naruto."

"Yeah? And you're so old it's gross, sensei. Let's get some ramen!"

"After midnight? I think not. Besides, where would I put my money?"

Naruto snickered and Iruka hit him over the head.

"You know, Iruka-sensei…"

"Hm?"

"Nice boxers. They're suiting."

"What the hell's _that_ supposed to mean, brat?"

"…nothing…"

.o.

It wasn't easy to aggravate the normally patient chuunin. He was, after all, a teacher to some of the most outrageous students in the village. Not to mention any names, of course, but Naruto far surpassed the rest in that category. So, when the man found himself staring up at the unbelievably morbidly obese landlord in front of him who looked highly capable of picking him up with a finger and squashing him while she (gracious, _was _this person even a she?) laughed his squished ass into next week, he was understandably unsettled. He cleared his throat.

"Um, sir…" It actually came out more as a question as he strained to find some sort of defining chest on the giant in front of him. Ah! He nearly jumped for joy as a slight jiggle classified the beefy person as female. "Or, well, ma'am…" He flinched as the figure peered down at him, and only then did he see the telltale whiskers of a growing beard. So had that jiggle only signified manly boobs?

"Er, actually…"

"I don't have the time to play games, sonny. Whudda you want, skipping around here?" Man, and he thought Naruto was loud?

"May I come in, please?" Really now, what person conducted business on someone's doorstep? He reasonably wondered what the inside of the apartment looked like. It _must_ be enormous to support such a gargantuan-

"No." What a bitch… er, bastard, defying all the codes of good mannerisms! Iruka cleared his throat again, trying to ease the fury from the blatant refusal.

"Well, I'm actually here on the business of Naruto Uzimaki in room-"

"Seven on the first floor, yes, I'm fairly aware that he won't be here any longer." The landlord rolled his…(her?) eyes to the ceiling. "I'm not surprised it happened really, but it sure took them long enough to get him out of here. Having him here's been a killer for business, if you know what I mean." Iruka frowned harshly at the figure in front of him, his anger building up to the equivalence of the size of the landloard. And that was a lot of anger…(and a lot of landlord.)

"No," he said coldly. "I _don't_ know what you mean." He glared at the pudgy face, daring the figure to answer.

"What I _mean,_ sonny, is no one wants to room next to a monster of the likes of him." A large finger jabbed in the general directing of the trashed room that was now being cleared out.

"You could have helped him." Iruka's voice was icy, cutting through the air like a knife.

"I was out shopping," came the bored tone as an arm waved carelessly through the air. "If that's all, then?" The man nearly snapped the door in half as he slammed a hand against it, preventing the landlord from closing it on him.

"Why didn't you _help_ him? You should have been able to _hear_ something like that from half way across TOWN!"

"I told you, I was out shopping," The figure pressed hotly. It was an obvious lie. One they both knew, but she stuck to it like a fucking sticker.

"And I suppose so was the rest of the village? _At midnight,_ no less?"

The form snarled, a lip curling up into a cruel smirk. "What do you care anyway, old man? Even if we had all been home anyway, it's not like we would lift a finger to help him. Not after what _he_ did-"

"Damn it woman, that wasn't his FAULT!"

"Iruka. Let the woman go." The chuunin swirled around, now glaring daggers at the one person he wanted to see least at the moment. Kakashi leaned casually against the wall, not looking up from his _Come Come Paradise._

"I'm _fine_, and I don't need you're damn interference, _Kakashi._"

"That may be as it is, but I'm afraid that if our dear Mrs. Kona remains in your death grasp much longer, she might just, well, suffocate," he stated simply.

Iruka glanced back, and sure enough the woman he had pinned to the door by the neck was slowly turning a lovely plum shade under his fingers. With more disappointment to borderline murderous, he regretfully let the woman go, pressing his thumbs hard into her windpipes before releasing her. And hell if _that_ didn't feel good.

"You," the landlord gasped, clutching the ring of fat that might have been a neck once upon a potato chip. "You rest assured that," she gasped, whether for air or in anger was anyone's guess. "That _monster_ will never find a place to live. Not till he's burned in his grave!" She smiled triumphantly at the bemused jounin and the raging chuunin he was indifferently holding back by the jacket straps. "I have _contacts_!" The woman declared, as if it were the living doom of the people.

Kakashi smiled under his mask. "That's _nice_ Mrs. Kona. You have a…" he snickered a little as he searched for a suitable word. "…most _fitful_ day, okay? Thank you kindly for your time."

And in a swirl of leaves, the two were gone, leaving the old woman sputtering on the doorstep.

"Dammit Kakashi, I didn't need your help!" Iruka yelled above the shouts of "PERVERTS!". Apparently the jounin had picked the woman's locker room as the ending destination for his jutsu. Figured.

"Well, you most certainly weren't helping Naruto any, if that stands for anything." He flipped the page in the detested book.

"I, well, he, I mean to say that-"

"Hey cutie, you got a name?"

"Fine, you were right this time," he grouched, "but don't let it go to your head." And then he smiled. It was for Naruto, right? "Thanks."

"PERVERT!" Iruka bowed low as a bottle of perfume flew over his head, landing in the other man's hand. Kakashi looked up at the horde of…rather naked… murderous women.

"Hey, thanks, babe. I'll be sure to wear it out tomorrow." He winked his lone visible eye, breathing in the scent of the jar. "So, we're on for a date?"

Iruka scowled at the other teacher. "Are you even listening?" he grumbled, thoroughly annoyed.

"Sure I am," he shrugged dramatically. "The wooing calls of all the beauties in their unclothed glory- Ow, what was that for?"

This time the bottle had struck true to its mark, the stench of vanilla strawberries leaking into the man and the room, drenching the jounin (and unfortunate chuunin) with a stench to rival a skunk's.

"Damn it Kakashi!"

"…so does that mean no date?"

* * *

**A/n- Alright, I have a bit to say, but please read through this, and bear with me! .:begs:.**

**First off, I've been informed, and I've been thinking myself, that my new chapters are not up to par with my first one. I'm thinking on quitting this fic if it doesn't work out, but I need your _honest_ opinions. Should I keep going? What needs fixing? What do you as readers like, hate, want? (And thanks for your previous help with pairings, you've all been GREAT!)**

**Second, just as a pointer, I realize I mulched part of the second chappy, and people thought it was going a bit fast. Naruto was not offering sex to Iruka, you naughty fangirls. (Maybe I should have made him though, yeah?) He was offering his body as a tool to relieve some aggressive stress in the form of a beating. That's why he has so many bruises, and told Iruka not to hit him until after he did his portion of work. You will get your share of naughtyness if I finish this story up in the future. Hang in there!**

**So, is there anyone out there who really enjoys this story who would be willing to read a chapter before I post it, and kinda beta it? For example, read through it, and tell me if it's good enough to post, and if there's anything I missed or needs changing… I'd really appreciate it!**

**Something IloveNerds got me started on, I'm willing to do a drawing exchange. I draw realistic pics, but I'd like some good Naruto pics from you fans! Anyone up to a draw-off?**

**Thanks all! I'm off to go eat my ramen, cherries, soda, pie, skittles, and maybe a cat or two. Thanks for bearing with me! (and please don't kill me for not editing! I was too lazy to read through this. >. )**

**Anyway, .:points to review box:. Care to drop me a note?**


	4. Nothing to Hate

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Nothing To Lose  
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**A.N- Hey! After a MAJOR computer crash down, and some time in student management, I have come up with this chapter! bear with me. I know it sucks, but next chaper, I promise _Kyuubi_ to you all. :-p I'm REALLY sorry to all of those who sent me reviews, if I haven't responded. I have a worthy explaination, but I'll save it for now. If you sent one to me, and didn't recieve a reply, contact me again so I can apologize more personally and give you my undivided attention. I mean it! (I'd appreciate it if you all would). That said, please enjoy as much as you can, and at least stick around one more chapter. I'll make it up to you. **

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RELATIONSHIPS-  
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Man, if he could only just reach that bowl of ramen…

**Knock knock.**

Just a couple more centimeters and it would be _his._ Ah, he could _smell_ it.  
Must be miso…

**Knock Knock!**

His fingers had barely graced the tip of the steaming bowl before-

"Naruto! Open up!"

But alas, the ramen had disappeared, only to be replaced by the distasteful reality of early morning on the hard wooden floor. And since when did the door become so demanding?

"Mhm commin', so hang onna sec, k?" Naruto stumbled forward groggily, pawing at his heavy eyelids as he reached for the door handle. He tugged, but instead of opening, the damn piece of wood resisted the pull, yanking on his arm muscles until he let go. He tugged again. Muttering a string of early morning curses at the door, Naruto shoved it half heartedly. And hold its own, it did, the lame little fucker.

The wooden door withstood a couple more futile attempts of pulling, pushing, and rather undignified whimpering, until he unlatched the hook and turned the lock he had forgotten was there Still not yet fully awake, he opened the door and looked blearily out into the street.

"Sensei, it's gotta be stinkin' two in the morning. G'back ta bed. I'm not gunna die of cold out here just cuz you're lonely." He rubbed his hands together, and muttered, "It's freaking _cold."_ Before he shut the door again and turned to go back to sleep.

But since when did Iruka sensei have pink hair and such a damn sexy body?

"Ah, shit." Fully awake, Naruto yanked the door open and found the retreating form through the misty night. "Sakura!" She turned, and for the first time in a long time, was smiling at _him._ Not at a shadow behind him, and not at a figure in the tree above him, but right at him, so there could be no mistake. He had always wondered what it would be like at the receiving end of one of those smiles, and now, it left him utterly breathless. "Sakura. It's cold outside. Come in?" She nodded, rubbing her hands together to warm herself, lips blue from the bitter night.

"Thanks, Naruto." He nodded and shut the door behind her, oblivious as usual to the discomfort level of the green eyes fixed upon his back. "Hey, I-"

"Here." He grabbed his orange jacket by the sleeve, ripping it shrewdly off whatever it had been thoughtlessly strewn upon, and draping it over her shoulders as she pulled it closer to her body.

"I owe you one, Naruto…" but the blonde was already waving off her comment.

"It's no big deal, really. It's cold. I bet it'd be warmer outside if it were snow-" he stopped as he looked at the article of clothing she held tightly against her frame, then gulped. The teen had managed a complete 180, slowly wheeling about on the spot to eye the chair where he had grabbed the jacket. And right where it should be, his matching pants lay carelessly thrown across the backrest. Naruto blushed a deep crimson and scratched the back of his wild blond head as he looked down at himself. His half naked self, clad only in light blue boxers. "Ehhh…" he coughed, kicking aside one of the random juice cans littering the floor. "Erm, Sakura… you mind turning around for a sec?" She laughed softly, but complied as he snatched his orange pants back from the chair.

"That's silly, Naruto," she chided softly. "You and Sasuke wash in the river like that all the time after training."

"Yeah, but that's different," he quipped back at his pink haired crush, pulling the clothing on hastily. "K, you can turn around again." It wasn't much, but he felt safer. Less vulnerable.

… and rather shirtless. The only shirt he had was probably buried six feet in rotting garbage where he had thrown it out the night before after the mission. After all, a shirt is not a shirt when it displays more skin than fabric.

There was a moment of rather awkward silence and head scratching from Naruto before he voiced the first topic on mind.

"Ramen?"

Sakura raised an eyebrow. "Excuse me?"

"Eh, I mean… hungry? I… don't have much, really, but if you want some ramen, I think I still have a cup left…" And suddenly he wished that Sakura was anywhere but in his new apartment. It didn't matter to him that he didn't own much, and what little he did possess wasn't in any shape to be flaunting. It didn't matter that he didn't have a bed any more, and that his fridge was completely empty, because all he needed was himself. But Sakura… she shouldn't have to see this…

She nodded to his offer, and he set about preparing the food. Strange, how such familiar things can become so difficult to perform.

"Naruto, I just- well…" she absently tapped the piece of paper that he instantly recognized as the one he had given her before. "Thanks for letting me come over and all… I know it's kinda late, but I…" Sakura looked away, shifting uneasily from one leg to the other.

"Sakura, are you okay?" She found his blue eyes looking intensely back at her, for once, all the humor and mirth gone from their depths.

"Yeah, I'm fine really, but…"

"Nobody hurt you, right? You can tell me, Sakura, cause I don't mind at all. I'll fight them for you if you need. Is that what you want? Who was it?" She laughed nervously at the stupidity of it all.

"No, it really wasn't that. I just… I had a fight with my parents, and I was wondering if you would- well, if it would be okay if I spent the night here?" She bit her lip. He had every right to tell her no. To tell her worse than no, after all the things she had done…all of the things she _hadn't_ done. Maybe it would have been okay to ask… if she had once, just _once_, come over with no reason in mind other than to say hi. And his shocked expression wasn't helping matters at all.

"Look, I can completely understand if-"

"Sure." He smiled, blowing on the steaming ramen in the bowl before handing it to her. "You can sit down, you know. It's not much, but this place comes with the table. Pretty cool, huh?" He tapped the small desk with one of his knuckles, pulling out the chair he had taken his clothing from and offering her a seat.

"What?"

"You can sit down, if you-"

"No, that wasn't what I meant. You mean that you'll let me spend the night here?" She looked up at him hopefully, suddenly seeing more to this boy than just obnoxious energy. More than the monster her parents claimed he was.

"However long you need to stay, you're welcome, you know." He tilted his head to the side, looking at her from an angle.

She nodded again, allowing him to push in the chair she had seated herself in as she cupped the warm bowl in one hand, and picked up her chopsticks with the other. But of course, without a hand to hold the large jacket to her shoulders, the clothing slipped off, sliding to the floor where Naruto picked it up, placing on the girl once more.

"It's okay, really, Naruto. I'm warm enough." But even as she said so, a slight tremor ran down her spine, leaving a fine trail of goose bumps across her arms and neck.

"Yeah, I can see that. Just eat." As she picked at the noodles in the cup, the warmth surrounded her once more.

"Naruto?" It was slightly uncomfortable eating with her shirtless friend holding a jacket to her body behind her, silently staring off into a far corner of the room while he waited for her to finish the food, apparently lost in thought. Uncomfortable, but warm. She had to wonder how the boy managed to train daily in this clothing. It was nice on a freezing night, but what about all those hot days dueling Sasuke, or running from him, out in the sun?

He made a low note in the back of his throat to acknowledge her question, but continued to stare into a place so far off, she doubted she could see what it was he was really looking at.

"Naruto, I love Sasuke," she breathed gently into the bowl, afraid that if she looked up into his eyes, what she would see there would make her feel like some sort of monster. But she had to make herself say it. It would be nothing short of cruel to let her blonde friend continue hoping for her to return his obviously intense feelings. She didn't want to use him after all the generosity he had shown her. Not just this night, but all those times he had been there for her before.

"I know," he responded softly, still refusing to look at her. To look away from the spot he had fixed his thoughtful gaze upon. His voice carried a sadness in the calm acceptance that made her want to cry, to tell him she really _did_ love him…

but she didn't.

"I'm done. Thanks." He finally looked down at her, his eyes and lips smiling sadly, even while his heart was breaking. He removed his hands from her shoulders, letting her hold the jacket in place herself once again.

"Sakura…" Naruto's eyes were pleading as he looked back at her, the dish in one hand as he stopped on the way to the sink. She knew she had hurt him…torn away his dreams once again, but the look of pain in his eyes was heartbreaking.

"Look, Naruto, I really am sorry that I had to-"

"I don't have a bed for you." One of her eyebrows shot up until it disappeared altogether in her hairline, her old anger swelling up again. _That_ was the reason he was so worked up?

"You know, it doesn't have to be perfect or anything. Can you show me where you were sleeping before? I'm sure it'll be just fine…" She frowned, annoyed at his sudden burst of kindness towards her. When she came to his apartment, she had fully expected and prepared to be yakked into her grave, but this was something completely unexpected. Naruto threw her one last guilty look before he turned and padded barefoot into the small adjoining room. Feeling almost as if she were intruding, and a little more than out of place in the apartment, Sakura quietly pursued his almost purposefully surreptitious lead. He was taller now, Naruto, not quite the childish figure he was when they had met. Becoming moderately irked at trying to peer over a wash of golden spikes into the room beyond, Sakura nudged passed the blonde who had parked himself in the doorway, obscuring the next room from view.

A quick inspection of that very room revealed…

No bed. And then she followed his solemn gaze to the far corner, where a pile of blankets and a small pillow lay disrupted in the heap he had left them in when he awoke.

"I know it's nothing much," he muttered, walking towards the area he had designated for sleeping in, suddenly hating the spot more than anything. "But I never had the kinda money to get anything fancy, you know." He laughed, a little bitterly. "The last one won't be of much use to me now, all burned up like that."

Sakura walked up beside him, looking down at the circular indent in the heap of blankets that looked for all the world as if a human sized cat had curled up amongst them.

"No, it's fine. In fact," she smiled for him again, "I've always wanted to sleep on the floor. My parents don't see the point in it, so I never really got to. So, will you let me?" She batted her lashes prettily for effect, loving the way his own eyes seemed to light up, and all the while enjoying the small smile that touched his lips. She liked his smile. His honest smile.

"Of course! Iruka-sensei let me borrow the blankets, and that pillow, so they should be pretty clean." He turned to walk back out the door. "If you need anything, I'll be in the next room, so just call, okay? I promise you, you'll be safe tonight, so you can just go to sleep." And with that he retreated into the room beyond, leaving her to her own thoughts.

He smelled nice, she decided, laying against the pillow he had been using. She frowned slightly, noticing the damp spots that smelled wretchedly like drying tears. So maybe he wasn't as tough as he acted around others… but of course, she had already known that. She had just never taken the time to care.

.o.

"Um, Naruto?" It had always been uncomfortable for her, walking through other people's houses, especially creeping around at night, in the dark no less, but then again, when you have to go, you have to go.

She found him lying with his face tucked in his arms, sleeping silently on the desk she had eaten at that night, and felt the slight stabs of guilt as she realized it never crossed her mind before to wonder where he would sleep. Funny though, she had always imagined hi snoring possibly as loud as he talked, but the only imperfection of his sleeping image was the string of drool hanging from the corner of his mouth.

"Naruto?" This time, the boy raised his head groggily, looking up at her with an unfocussed gaze.

"Sakura? You okay?"

She nodded, a light shade of red creeping from her neck to her face.

"Um, bathroom?"

"Oh." He pointed to the door she had mistaken to be a closet entrance. "Right there."

The bathroom wasn't as bad as she thought it would have been, considering the quality of the rest of the house. For some unknown reason, she had expected dirt or mold, or something unexplainable covering the floor and toilet seat, but she was relieved the find a normal bathroom, albeit a small one at that. But what about this place wasn't small? It must be so lonely…

Sakura stepped out, the smell of toast filling the air. She sighed, following the scent back to the table where her host had laid out a plate of the buttered bread for her. Would he ever stop trying to please her? It was almost becoming intolerable…

Naruto smiled, offering her the seat, then the food, filling a tiny cup with milk and passing it to her.

"Didn't think you would want ramen for breakfast as well, so I went out to one of those all night stands while you were sleeping." It was still dark out, so she couldn't have possibly been asleep that long…

"Aren't you eating, though?"

"Naw, I got some ramen to go." He waved off her concern, then looked back at her. "But I remember you told me you liked toast and milk, so I grabbed some of that for you…"

"Naruto, we were six years old when I told you."

"So?" She shook her head in perplexion at the boy's confusion. "Do you not like it anymore, cause I can go back and get something-"

"No, that's not it. It's okay. And really, thanks for letting me stay."

"Ah." The blonde blushed lightly, looking down at the table. "I also got something else, I thought you might like…" he coughed, unsure whether or not to continue until the pink haired girl urged him on. Tugging on something from his back pocket, Naruto pulled out what he had bought for his friend. "It's a-"

"Sakura blossom? Naruto, they don't bloom until Spring…" And yet, the pink petals spread out, magnificently displaying their beauty.

"They always say that the late bloomers are among the most beautiful…" But he wasn't looking at the flower when he spoke. His eyes were so captivating as leaned across the table to gaze at her.

"Naruto, I-"

SLAM!

The whole building seemed to shake as something made an incredible impact against the door.

"Open the door, _demon_, or we're breaking it down!"

The blonde growled low in his throat, casting an unsure glance at the shocked girl behind him.

"So soon? They sure don't waste any time coming after me…"

"Naruto, I think that's-"

"Sakura!" The door shuddered again as something slammed into it once more, the hinges coming loose. They knew she was in there with him? He threw out an arm protectively at the next blast, as if to shield her behind the extension of thin skin.

"I told you I'd protect you, so don't worry." Her eyes widened as the fingernails of the hand that reached out to hold hers seemed to grow longer… sharper…

"No, you don't understand! You can't-"

His face, almost terrifying now as sharp points emerged from his mouth… fangs?

"I told you, I won't let them hurt you. They only want me. That's how it always is." His very voice was changing, deeper and more commanding.

"Naruto, listen to me, they're-"

SLAM!

And this time, the wooden barrier couldn't hold against the attack, shattering, and sending splinters flying throughout the room.

"_MONSTER!"_

Eyes that were never meant for a human body slit open, red and furious as he charged the men entering-

"_NARUTO, STOP! _They're my _parents,"_ Sakura sobbed, fear and desperation lacing her words.

And the boy stopped.

She blinked, wondering if she had only imagined the change, for the teen standing stiff in the middle of the room was the boy she had known all her life…

"I'm gunna _kill you demon!"_

The girl screamed.

"Naruto, MOVE!"

…but he didn't. The eyes that looked back at her over his shoulder were still soft, no desire to fight within them. He smiled.

"It's okay now, honey. Look here." Cool fingers gripped her chin, turning her head so her watery eyes locked with her mother's even gaze. A cry of pain reverberated through the walls, and her head snapped to the side, but a hand had already wrapped around it, forcing her gaze away from the fight. "Shh, it's okay. We'll take care of the boy. Are you well?"

"Let me _go!" _she screamed, struggling to find her friend around her mother's attempts to shield her from the fray, but it was useless. Tears streamed down her cheeks as the sickening crack of a body hitting the wall tore through her ears. Through her heart. "Don't _hurt him!_" And now, she wasn't sure she wanted to see anything more.

"Shh," her mother soothed, gently rubbing slow circles on her back. "You're just in shock. It's okay." And then, deathly quiet in her child's ear, "Don't worry anymore. The penalty for kidnap and rape is… death."

She choked. On her tears, on her pain, on her fear, she wasn't sure anymore.

"…death?" she whispered numbly, her material body barely noticing the silence that had fallen through the room. "Rape? But…" her eyes opened wider in comprehension, tears spilling randomly to the floor. "He never _touched_ me…"

"…but _they_ don't know that." Her mother's wise voice cut through the deafening silence. "Who do you think the Hokage will believe?"

"Hey, sis… did he hurt you?"

"No, no. She'll be fine. Just shocked is all." The brisk voice shot through her mind, snapping her back into reality. Her brother leaned close to her, inspecting her inch for inch.

"Naruto, where is he?" Her voice rose in panic. What had she done? What had she brought upon her friend?

"Don't worry, sis. Dad's finishing him off right now somewhere. Speaking of…" Sakura tried to stand again, feeling her brother leaving her side and the sound of the wooden table being dragged into the makeshift bedroom. Then the smell of smoke.

"We should get out of here, before the place collapses…"

They were burning…?

Someone helped her stand fully, guiding her past the walls streaked in red. There was so much red…

_Blood,_ her treacherous mind supplied for her. _Naruto's blood._

"…stop…"

_He's dying… right now… all alone._

"Stop…"

_All he ever wanted was your friendship… and now, you've killed him._

**"STOP!"**

.o.

He laughed, because he knew that's what he was born to do until the end. He could feel the blood at the corners of his mouth… could taste the metallic fluids as he coughed more of it onto the dirty ground. A hardened boot connected with his ribs, and he barely noticed when something inside him snapped. It wouldn't be the first time.

"Don't forget your place, _demon_." And rough hands shoved him once more into the dirt. Back where he belonged.

He tried to say something. Tried to open his mouth and speak, but all that emerged was a sick gargle as he spat more blood out of his mouth.

Something stirred within him, growled at him for being so stupid, for not fighting back, but…he couldn't. This was Sakura's _family._ She would cry if she knew. And she should never, _never_ cry.

"Damn it, boy, you're gunna regret every mistake you made here and now!"

But he already did regret them. He was fairly certain that he would always regret them, but most of all, he would regret being alone.

"…ka-sen…sens…" He gasped, choking on the liquids overflowing his mouth as another kick landed in his stomach. He wanted to call for help, someone to take him away from this place, ad he tried not to laugh when he realized-

There was no one.

"Ir… u…sens…"

He had lost his vision only moments before, and his hearing was playing tricks with him. His wrists…why couldn't he move his wrists?

The next blow landed against his head, and he let out one last yelp before he let the pain consume him. Fire licked at his body, but somehow, it didn't burn. He had read somewhere about a place called hell… where demons and bad people went when they died…but if this was it, maybe it wouldn't be quite so bad as he had thought…

**My, Kit. You're a hard one to keep alive.**

And hearing voices definitely wasn't good either…

The man left him lying… Gasping and bleeding in that dark and lonely alleyway, where even the homeless had no home for him. Waiting for death to take him.

"Beat it, kid." The man spat on his still form, leaving him broken and…dying from the inside…

.o.

The dark rings around her haunted eyes didn't get any smaller. She was waiting… waiting… the stench of smoke left behind her, and the images of blood…_Naruto's_ blood, still lingering in her mind. It was all over the place. On the walls, on the floor, on her brother…

The door to their house opened, and her eyes shot up, but she regretted looking the moment she saw her father before her.

He was stained with a blood that wasn't his own, but what she couldn't understand, what made matters al the worse… he was smiling. Why was he smiling?

"Daddy?" Sakura could feel, could taste, could smell, the bile rising in her throat that she fought to keep down as he walked over to her, smiling his sick smile. "Where?" she had managed to croak.

He frowned, then shrugged, tossing her question to the wind.

"Left him in some alley or other. They won't find him for a couple of days though; not till he starts stinking."

"You… he's…?" The man stroked her hair, something that used to sooth and calm her as a child, but now it only made her sick.

"No, not yet. Will be in a couple hours, when he bleeds himself dry. But, he won't be coming back."

And she cried. To know that she could still save him, but then, she couldn't.

"Sakura, you don't need to make a point with us by hanging with trash like that." He plucked the pink flower that she still clung to with numb fingers. Funny, she didn't recall bringing it back with her… Carefully, making sure she studied his movements, he tore the little pink petals to shreds before her horrified gaze. "Never, _never,_ do it again, or daddy'll get mad."

.o.

Iruka groaned as he shuffled through his closet. Even the hot shower he had just stepped out from couldn't wipe the stench of perfume from his body, and he didn't fancy smelling like a flowery sissy boy either. All these years, all those hard tests and vigorous chores to become a full fledged chuunin ninja, and he couldn't even smell like a man anymore. Damn Kakashi. He should expect no less.

Miserably holding up a pair of white boxers bedecked in happily floating hearts, he bowed his head low and sighed.

"And I liked these ones too," he sniffed mournfully as he threw them back into the basket and withdrew another pair of- more manly- undergarments. Blue. Like the shade of blue Kakashi's body would be when he finished beating the pulp from him Old School style.

For a second, the man froze, an odd feeling of another presence outside his house washing over him, but he laughed it off, quickly tugging the blue boxers up as he let the towel around his waist drop to the floor.

"Not now, Kakashi," he yelled around the direction of the shuffling noise by his doorstep, a smirk tugging at the man's lips. "You're worse than my academy students. Even _they_ could detect you a mile off," he scoffed, shaking his head in comical exasperation. There was no answer, and the complete childishness of these late night visits were wearing his nerves thin. It was always the same with the jounin. Show up at the worst possible moments, wave a hello, then demand some sort of food or beverage on the basis of Iruka not being hospitable enough. He snorted, rolling his eyes as he walked towards the door, pulling his hair back into a rather wet ponytail as he frowned in annoyance.

Pushing back on the door handle, he leaned against the wooden frame and scowled at the figure in front of him.

…who wasn't Kakashi.

The person's face was hidden, lowered down so the shadows of the night completely obscured the features, but Iruka knew instantly who it was. He could recognize that person anywhere, anytime, his vibrant orange suit unmistakable for miles.

"Naruto? What're you doing out here this late? …It's freaking _cold_, and you don't even have your jacket on?" Iruka sighed. This boy was impossible, stubborn enough to be considered suicidal. "Well, come on in then, you look like a vampire, standing out like that in the dark," he finally grumbled fondly. He stepped aside to offer room for entrance, but the boy merely swayed on the spot.

"Naruto?"

"…ka-sensei?" The figure took a step forward, then instantly stumbled towards the confused chuunin, futilely trying to regain his balance. A foot from the man, finally in the full light that seeped from the doorway, Naruto stopped dead.

Iruka choked as he looked at the teen shivering in front of him, eyes wide in shock until the blonde's legs gave way, and he collapsed into the man's chest, his bare sides heaving heavily against his teacher's.

At first he had thought the boy in his arms had fainted, but then his shoulders began to shake, until his entire frame was moving to the rhythm of his sobs.

And Iruka did the only thing he was capable of doing at the moment, the only thing that seemed right, even if it made no sense. He pulled the child closer, whispering words of comfort as he stroked the matted hair.

Tender fingers graced over raw bruises, inspecting the boy's ribs that were far from whole. And when he pulled his hand back, it was slick with blood.

He finally realized the boy was no longer conscious when the soft breath that ghosted against his exposed chest slowed down, though it was anything but eased. Was that even a good sign? He wasn't sure whether it was sweat, blood, or tears that coursed mostly down both bodies, still connected by the strong embrace, but did it really matter?

"Naruto…"

.o.

He had never thought for a moment that for once in his life, opening his eyes would be so difficult. The hardest thing he had ever done, simply because…he didn't want to. Didn't want to open his eyes and let the warmth around him, behind him, disappear. Didn't want to open his eyes to another day in reality.

And right now, reality hurt like a bitch.

…And also happened to be tickling his nose at the same time. Fancy that.

He tried to turn his head, only to receive a face full of whatever happened to be forcing itself up his nostrils, and loosing the battle against his body, he sneezed.

…right into Iruka's face.

He blinked as his teacher slowly wiped the spit from his skin, shaking his head as his ponytail dripped Naruto slobber down his back. So that was the little fucker that woke him up. Would figure.

"Hey Naruto… 's 'bout time you got up," he yawned, sitting back in the chair he had pulled up next to the couch the blonde was spread out on. "I guess that's what I get for poking around your body when you wake up, huh?" Naruto looked down to where his teacher had been looking him over, frowning at the layers of white linen that clung to his exposed torso. He peeled away the rest of the blanket covering him with cloth-wrapped arms, only to find that the rock that he had thought was pinning his legs down, was in actuality….more of that damned bandage. He glared at the man.

"Not only do I feel like shit, but you made me _look_ like it too. I'm not a dress up doll, yanno, sensei," he informed the smirking man, irritation edging his voice. He could feel the results of last night in throbs at every heartbeat, but he'd be damned if he was gunna tell his teacher that.

"Yeah, but that's something I've been meaning to ask you about," the man voiced, a rather puzzled expression caressing his features. "You said something before about the demon helping you heal?"

"Demon? _Did_ I say something about a demon before?" he questioned, raising an eyebrow at the chunnin. So, maybe the man wasn't as stable as he had thought. He wouldn't put it past the guy to be slightly out of wack. He _was_ a teacher, wasn't he?

"Kyuubi," he pressed, a little more urgently. "What is it to you?" The boy's expression lit in understanding.

"Oh, _Kyuubi_." He nodded. "Of course. Doesn't yours help you heal too, sensei?"

Iruka shook his head, not knowing where to start. He still wasn't ready to tell the kid the truth about the monster inside of him. Not when Naruto was so weak, anyway. There would be no telling what would happen if his emotions spiked in this state, as they were likely to do with the sudden burden of life-changing infromation.

"Naruto," he began, slightly uneasy, "you see, most people don't, uh…" he sighed. "Well, that's really not the case. I wanted to know though… why aren't you healing?"

The boy gave it all of five seconds to think over before shrugging his shoulders with a highly sophisticated, "Gee, sensei… I dunno." It really wasn't that important to him at the moment. "Well, Kyuubi isn't really that powerful, see? 'S got some sorta barrier that won't release all the chakra, and it makes for a _really_ slow healing process lately. Dunno why, though."

Iruka mauled over the information, then froze as the truth hit him.

"Naruto… you were…" the pain in the man's eyes struck home in the child's heart.

"Iruka sensei?"

"You were going to… die… weren't you?"

For a moment, there was complete silence, before the teen spoke up, his voice low and serious.

"I thought so… but I always used to think so, every time something like this happened. I-" he shivered. Why couldn't the man just have left it be? He could have just moved on…just forgotten about it. This was only reopening sore wounds. Why the _hell_ couldn't he have just dropped it? It was already done an over with, time to get up and move on…

"It _had_ to have been something serious, given that your healing rate dropped considerably. You should at least have been able to stand this morning…"

"What does that have to do with Kyuubi?" Naruto frowned, his old anger swelling up to challenge his teacher.

"It's… more powerful than you think, Naruto. Look, I can't say for sure, but… do you think this…_Kyuubi…_ might have exhausted its chakra for the moment? If- if it was anything like what I imagine happened last night, you should be dead.

.o.

Flashback

.o.

_It was still dark when Iruka had gone out. He had to know, _had_ to know… didn't _want_ to know, but he knew he would never, _could_ never forgive himself if he didn't find out. He had followed the bloody tracks, as if he were a shadow following the boy as the scene played out again in the obvious proof of what had happened. He could see the crimson handprints against the walls where the teen had fought to support himself; had skirted around the puddles where the boy had fallen, and most likely passed out while he slowly bled his life into the ground. And then he had seen the alley. Had found the secret at the end of the maze. The bitter truth of what had happened._

_His meal had long since been emptied into the nearest graffiti-ridden trash bin, and even as he looked at the blood soaked ground, he couldn't find the stomach to keep in the rest. This time, he hadn't made it to the dump in time, leaving the evidence of his nausea on the ground beside him._

_He had dug the dulled kunai from the stained dirt, and found the old cigar, crushed on the floor a little ways away. The two weapons used against the blue eyed youth. When he found the boot that smashed the teen's ribs in, that had broken his wrist and shattered his arm… he would rip apart the body attached, and watch as the figure died. He would suffocate the person, as they had tried to do to Naruto._

_He had followed the bloody footprints back to a large home, the lights still shining even at this dark hour. He knew who lived there…_

_And he couldn't do it._

_Throwing the blood soaked weapon so it pinned the burned out cigar to the dead center of the door, he left, his silent warning dripping the open threat onto the Haruno family's doorstep._

.o.

"…ei?"

Iruka jerked his head back to look back into his student's bemused gaze. "Sensei, you alright? Maybe you should lie down, you must have been up for like, _forever._" He gestured with his head, his arms still immobile at his sides, and for an instant, the light caught the deep finger shaped bruises that hovered angrily over his windpipes.

"You know," the chuunin mused, still lost in thought, though now aware of his surroundings. "I've always hated that fox, but I think I can come to appreciate it a little bit more now."

"Sensei?" Naruto looked up at the man from his designated stack of pillows, throwing him an I'm-Not-So-Sure-You're-Stable-At-The-Moment look, and Iruka laughed outright.

"You're _alive_, Naruto," he breathed, as if only now realizing it.

"Well, hell, sensei… so I am. Nice of you to observe."

"No, it was the fox, inside of you… for once I'm thankful that it's there…"

"Kyuubi?" Naruto frowned, sulking himself further into the pillows. "I always thought Kyuubi was a rabbit," he pouted, looking away as he muttered, "I _like_ rabbits."

"Naw." Iruka poked the boy's unprotected forehead with a finger, snorting as the blonde wriggled away from the contact. "A fox is far more suiting to your personality, Naruto." He sighed, nudging the teen's good arm till blue eyes met his own. The chuunin smiled wickedly down at the teen, who eyed him back suspiciously. "Scoot over."

Naruto rightfully balked.

"What? But…I'm too comfortable…"

"Well, looks like you're gunna have to be comfortable in another position, now scoot." Naruto grinned savagely, raising an eyebrow at the man above him.

"You can't, cause this side's all bandaged up. You wouldn't wanna hurt me, now would you?" Playing others' weaknesses against them had always been the highlight of Naruto's backup plans, never ceasing to fail. And besides, it wasn't _him_ that had done the bandages up so thickly and tightly that movement was near impossible.

The man pondered for a second before returning the grin. "Well, I do suppose that could serve as a problem for me, huh?" He sighed, until an instant later he had himself wedged between the back of the couch and the startled blonde, forcing the teen over by pure weight administered by his shoulder. "But then again, that's never really stopped me before, has it?" Hot breath tickled the back of the boy's neck, making the small hairs stand on end.

"That was a cheap shot, sensei!"

"Cheap shots don't make you a chuunin," he stated. "But quick skills do." He yawned. "Now go to sleep, or at least let me. I've been up all night." Naruto tried turning to face the man behind him, and growled in irritation when an elbow pressed into his padded ribs. And if that didn't hurt like hell…

"You could try using your own bed, you know. That's the reason you _have_ one…"

Iruka poked the boy in the side, eliciting a sharp squeal. "It's… not useable right now…"

"How can a bed not be usable?" And a second later, "Ew, _sensei_… please tell me you weren't…?"

"No! It's nothing like that, Naruto," he insisted quite forcefully. It wouldn't do for a kid of Naruto's age to be imagining his teacher doing… that. "It just isn't... available…" Iruka sighed mournfully. Actually, his bed was currently hosting a pile of discarded boxers with cute images on them, not to mention his teddy bear… (probably still buried somewhere under the boxers).

"Iruka sensei?" Naruto coughed slightly, a sign that really shouldn't be ignored, but-

"Hm?"

"You…smell like a flowery sissy girl."

"And you smell like a pig, so what's your point?" he grumbled back.

"Nothing…"

There was an uncomfortable silence before-

"Sensei?"

"The answer is no."

Silence, and then-

"What's all my stuff doing here, sensei?" The teen was staring in the corner of the room by the door at the small grocery bag filled with his few possessions. Ah shit. He had really meant to hide it so they could talk about this later…

He covered his face with his hand, not for the first time at loss for words. The kid's blunt way of communication had a habit of making him choke on his own sentences. Iruka had a feeling that his nose could take little more of the rubbing he had been administering on it over his Naruto-filled week. Noses just weren't built to endure such actions against them.

"Naruto, I… well, after you came here, your apartment was…or, see, I had this talk with the Hokage and he thinks it would be best if… but I can see if you really don't want to, uh-"

"Spit it out." The blonde's voice was rightfully anxious, if not a little annoyed.

"Naruto…I wanted, I _want_ you to, uh… will you live with me?" The boy's back stiffened and the man hastened to finish his sentence. "It'd only be for a little while, see, but-"

"No."

"But there's _nowhere else!_"

"I've slept outside before, you know. I can do it again till I find a place. I'm not gunna be living with _you_ though."

Iruka's heart stopped, unexplainable pain emitting in waves throughout his body. What had he done wrong? He growled at himself for the stupidity of it all. It shouldn't bother him so much, but he wanted more than anything… to what? Be with the kid? Help him? He didn't know _what_ the hell he wanted, but he was sure, _positive _that he would know… if only Naruto would…

"Why do you keep blocking me out, Naruto?" he rasped through a suddenly dry throat. He reached a hand out to touch the teen's shoulder, only to feel the child flinch away.

"Why do you keep pressing?" came the stoney voice. And it hurt. It really did.

"Because, I-" _What? Because what, exactly?_ He was running circles, and he knew it. "Never mind. I understand, but I'm not going to dump a hurt kid out on the streets at this time of night. We'll see how you are in the morning, okay?" He sat up, trying to see the face on the other side of the back that was turned to him, but there was nothing that wasn't hidden in shadow. Iruka sighed, jumping tiredly over the back of the couch to land silently on his feet as he loosened the ties of his blood stained jacket and walked towards his bedroom. There's just nothing like sleeping in a pile of your own crisp boxers as they smile at you and taunt you with happy little hearts.

"Hey." He whirled around to face the boy on his couch, who smiled guiltily back at him. Guilt. That was one emotion his didn't want from the blonde. "There's still some room here, yanno," he offered, shifting further towards the edge of the couch until he was nearly slipping off.

"No thanks, Naruto." And he continued on his path towards his bedroom. And then-

"I'll stay."

Iruka froze in his tracks, not daring to look back. Not wanting to see that smile as the boy told him he was only kidding. He didn't think he could handle it.

"What?"

"If it honestly bothers you that much, I'll stay… if you still want me to, that is. I… really don't have anywhere else to go…"

The chuunin smiled, dumping his soiled vest on the floor next to the bedroom doorway.

"In that case, the couch _is_ looking a lot more comfortable than the ground…"

He retraced his steps to the back of the couch, jumping over then back onto to misused piece of furniture.

"You're gunna be cold," the blonde stated drowsily, jerking the blankets the man had landed on, offering him entry under them. But that would be too awkward, and he didn't have the heart to press the boy any further.

"Not so," Iruka mumbled, eyes closed as he drew the teen into himself.

"That fucking hurts, sensei."

"So fucking get over it, Naruto," was the muttered reply from his half unconscious teacher.

"You said something about my apartment earlier. What happened to it?"

"Eh? Oh, it kinda got burned…again…" The boy snorted, pushing himself farther into the man's embrace.

"You better not snore," he advised the… already snoring… Iruka.

"Damn it."

.o.

It was, _nice_, to say in the least. "Warm" wouldn't do the feeling inside him justice, and "comfortable" was not only too vague, but completely lackluster. He wanted more, wanted _everything_ this feeling had to offer, and while he was no novice to this experience, it always seemed new to him every time. He wanted to drown in it, stay like this forever.

Iruka couldn't help but reflecting on the indecency of feeling like this, thinking like this, but this was his own house, and he was a _man_, damn it! He wanted, _needed_ this time. It was ironic, really, how the only way he could really be with someone so close, so intimate, was to be securely alone; in the privacy of his own fantasy world. It had always been this way. And probably, would always be that way.

A smile touched his lips as he considered his options. What would he imagine she look like this time? Brown hair? Large eyes?

…but he already knew. He struggled a moment, in the confines of his semi-dream world and a blissful momentary reality, because he didn't want to admit it, not even to himself. Although he was alone, the lingering fear, the constant paranoia , the "what if" of someone intruding while he was calling that name…

…they would know what he was imagining behind eyes half shut, or half open, if you were an optimist. They would know what he truly desired, because even if his voice wasn't conviction enough, the heated state of his body would more than explain the dark secret his heart had been nursing.

But the fact was, he could almost _smell_ that smell he liked best. Hear that soft voice that was only too familiar as it whispered his name over and over… Feel the warm breath against his neck…

He wanted to reach down, help along the sensation that was crawling in his belly, but he decided that he _liked_ the feeling of his arms wrapped securely around the blankets in front of him. It gave off a sense of… companionship. Anyone could buy a whore, a dime a dozen, littering the streets like trash, but they were good for one thing; sex. Not to hug and kiss with anything other than ferocious and brutal lust. That was just the way things were, and not what he wanted. And he had his pride.

Hands occupied, he did the only possible move to relieve what he could of the tension, thrusting his hips into the blankets before him. He cursed silently at his clothing. Since when did he sleep in anything more than just boxers? …but, it would be too late now to remove it…

Feeling only a little stupid, but not really caring through the haze in his mind, the man pressed his face against the fabric, dragging his lower lip slowly up in a mock kiss as he moved his lower body in a heated dance across the same material. Tilting his head up to expose his neck, the chuunin groaned at the friction he allowed himself, his fingers touching what his imagination dubbed soft and silky enough to be hair. Blond hair.

And he stopped worrying, the last cares and sense of right and wrong too far behind him now in the mimic of real pleasure as he subconsciously moaned, forming words with numb lips.

"…Naruto…"

And wasn't he scared shitless when his blankets responded with a sleepy,

"…Iruka sensei?"

And while there really was no warm breath against his neck, there was most definitely a familiar ring to that solid voice…

"Oh _shit._" If he had recalled having company with him on the couch, did it _have_ to be the very blonde he was intentionally, but then again, _not_ intentionally trying to fuck? His body remained deathly still as the blood drained from his face, only to return in a hot wave that sent red hues from his neck up when the bundled blanket in front of him stirred slightly.

"You wanna let go of my hair, sensei?" he muttered, lifting his head ever so slightly off the pillow. "You snore like a freakin' bastard half the night, and now you're acting like you've got a bee up your ass. What's your problem?" Naruto snorted when the man released the hair he had been grasping at, wondering if the boy actually _knew,_ and thoroughly grateful the blonde could see nothing of the man to whom he had his back turned on. Then, deciding to take a chance and thank himself for wrapping the kid in such heavy bandages and blankets, he leapt over the couch's back, and shot off towards the bathroom.

"Bastard!" came the annoyed response from the disheveled and rather pissed off Naruto, who had all intentions of making his way over to the very room his teacher was now barricaded in.

…If he had been able to stand and walk on his own, which was rather out of the question at the moment. Slumping back into the pillow as the pounding of water from within the bathroom signified the shower starting, the blonde had nothing more to do than sulk. And he really had to piss. Leave it to Iruka sensei to hog the only place he could go.

Sighing, he closed his eyes once more. Well, Iruka-sensei couldn't blame it on _him_ if he spent all day in the shower and came out to a wet couch. It would be _his own fault_ if he didn't hurry the hell up.

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**Not what you expected? (or _was _it?) . Anyway, if you didn't reald the AN at the top, please do. :-) eh, and I didn't edit since I made it extra long for the wait. :-p Anywho, see yah next chapter, (I hope!) The big blue button is your friend!**


	5. Nothing to Fear

'.o.'

-+.:Nothing To Lose:.+-

'.o.'

**A/n- Hey guys, sorry this took so long, but also that I haven't been responding to all the GREAT reviews! I know you don't care, but my pride is making me tell you that…  
****I have AIDS.  
****Just playing. :-p That I'm currently enrolled in 11 classes, so…where has all my time gone? Horseback riding, of course. :-) Anyway… I **_**promise**_** to respond to any reviews, and I'll try to make them worthwhile, k?:-) Thanks, everyone.**

º¤ø,¸¸,ø¤ºº¤ø,¸¸ º¤ø,¸¸,ø¤ºº¤ø  
**The sticks and stones,  
****They break my bones,  
****And still,  
****The words, they hurt me.  
**º¤ø,¸¸,ø¤ºº¤ø,¸¸ º¤ø,¸¸,ø¤ºº¤ø

**-Chapter one-**

"I presume you know why I've gathered you all here at this hour?"

The Hokage stood no more than shoulder's height below the youngest of the jounin and handful of chuunin who had attended, and held himself regally, as though he simply didn't require the luxurious advantage of size.

There were grim nods throughout the meeting room _(Always grim, because life has never seemed so precious)_. The heavy navy blue and flash of dipping headbands was the only visible similarity uniting the Leaf nin, impossible to read anything beyond the angry scars and disfigurations that decorated the uneasy crowd.

"A frontal attack, Lord Hokage?" a newer chuunin ventured quietly. (_A suicide mission, Hokage-sama?)_ The air shivered coldly about them, hovering over the cluster of chuunin who had up until now combatted nothing outside the mission reports they filed or the afternoon academy classes they taught_. (Because after all, Chuunin was just a rank above Genin, and one can't possibly send children to war.)_

The intensity of all eyes upon the small leader was demanding, taxing, and his face seemed to age unnaturally as the light cast dim shadows in the creases of his brow. The expression gave him a look of perpetual grief, though the man couldn't entirely credit the light.

"No." He left an uneasy pause hovering over the room for a moment before he sighed heavily, sadly, though none of the tension seemed to drain his body with the action. "Backup. You'll be backup."  
Cracked, bitter, the word tasted like blood.

The intake of breath seemed to come from the room itself, shock ill concealed even behind the few masked faces. They were the best of the best, elite ninja… who else would be better suited to dismantle the enemy but them? They had never in such mass been… _backup…_

"Backup to who, Lord Hokage?" Murmurs and nods broke throughout the group, before-

"To this." Aged fingers withdrew a single tube of yellow green liquid, the contents murky and obviously vile as it murmured violently within its dark glass. A froth – or some abnormal form of chemical bubbling- was hovering at the top of the glass container, rolling over itself and not entirely merging or separating.

Content with the limitlessly revolting possibilities that swam in the vial's depths – viruses, enhancers, it didn't matter so long as it _worked_- with a dismissive wave of a withered hand, the group easily dispersed, filing silently out the doors to organize the village and await further instruction.

But the crowd had since passed, leaving a lone masked figure leaning against the far wall, staring expressionlessly at the leader, who acknowledged the presence without surprise.

"Kakashi. I thought you'd come around."

The jounin nodded, walking somewhat stiffly toward the smaller man, only the slightest crinkles in his mask betraying the hint of a frown.

"You're not happy." Kakashi didn't deny it.

"No, I'm not."

The older man let out a tired sigh, meeting the serious gaze of the jounin with all the intensity and strength he could find inside himself.  
There wasn't much left to offer.

"I honestly never thought I'd let matters come to this, and I regret it even now, but even you can't disagree, it's for the well being of the village that we do this." His voice wavered, only slightly, and yet there was an aged tiredness about it that left his statement beseeching. "You understand Kakashi, that I have no other choice. _Tell me_ that I do, and I will do it." (_But Hokage-sama, how presumptuous. Who said anything about a choice?)_

"Of course not. But this isn't just Naruto you're trusting. It isn't just the medication." He glared at the murky vial, willing his sharingan eye to destroy it, and all that it represented. "It's the fox. There's no telling what will happen once the liquid has been administered. Once it's… once it has entered his system."

"What are you thinking, Kakashi?"

"I'm thinking that I'll follow your orders to the death, but I you're making a huge mistake."

The Hokage sighed, his years shining through sunken eyes as he looked back into the tall man's face.

"I know I am; you don't need to tell me that. And I don't want to hurt him, but it's inevitable." He turned his gaze away in shame, no longer a proud leader, but a guilty elder who's sinned one too many times in his life. There was a moment's hesitation, harsh, reproachful, disgusted. "I have special orders for you."

"Orders?" Kakashi's voice was bitter, his stance tense as his muscles contracted in anger.

"Orders. Not a request."

"I understand." Acknowledgement, quiet and judging, given with a frown and a rigid back before he took his leave through the door, not even looking back as he spoke. "Even if he does survive this_, he'll never be the same."_

"He'll be a hero," the old man whispered to the closed door, long after it clicked shut, feeling utterly alone once more. "He'll be hated again, I know, but he'll be a _hero._"

.o.

It was cold by dawn in the Hidden Leaf. The wind always chilling to the bone, and so thick with stationary mist, one might find himself drowning in the liquid fog. There were silent whispers, choked out in superstitious premonitions, and sometimes a more logical, "The Mist nin are coming, can't you see the fog in the forest? It's _never_ that far into the forest."

The hush that fell on the village was eerie, faces etched as silhouettes shrouded in the fog, while others remain in the shadows behind their steaming windows, watching with dark expressions as the early morning light turned the sky a deep ocean blue.

"Sakura, he's late."

Sakura hugged her body for warmth, to keep her skin from crawling under that black, black stare, turning briefly to acknowledge her raven haired teammate. Any other day she would have been thrilled. Would have been beaming with pride to know that Sasuke, Sasuke _Uchiha_, was initiating some sort of conversation with her that wasn't geared towards a negative putdown.

But not today.

Not when it was before the sun had completed its forward arc in the sky, and when tension in the air space between the gathered Leaf ninja was so tight it was almost tangible, becoming more coporeal with each exhaled breath. Not when memories of the night before still haunted her mind. _Blood- on the walls, beneath her feet, in the air-_

"Oh, Kakashi sensei's always late, you know that." She waved off his statement with a forced tight-lipped smile and cheer that was a little too fake in her ears. The icy glare the boy penetrated her with told her that Sasuke didn't _need_ his Sharingan to see through her façade, and it sent her into another fit of unease, struggling to regain any sort of credibility with the surly teen. "And besides," she rushed, trying to control the subliminal signs of lying- Sasuke would know, they all did; it was their first academy lesson. "the jounin aren't supposed arrive for another…" she made an obvious point of judging the angle of the sun. "Five minutes or so."

"That's not what I meant," he growled. "Naruto. He's late."

Sakura flinched, guilt eating away at her insides. Of course she hadn't seen Naruto. Not since she had spent the night at his house, anyway. Not since… what had happened.  
Naruto wouldn't be showing up- not now, and possibly not ever. Her stomache churnned uneasily, a nauseating pulse quickening behind her eyes.

"N-naruto? Oh, isn't he always late? I mean, even the jounin couldn't wake him up at this hour for something-"

"Sakura, what happened to him?" There was a sharper irritable edge to the boy's quiet voice, and a few others looked up in nervous aggrivation, as if breaking the code of silence was an inexcusable crime.

"I don't know what you-"

"They don't call _gennin_ out for everyday missions, and take a look around you." Sakura did, though only for the convenient escape from having to look into those _eyes_. They were thankfully dark, a black hue she associated with the fainter imprint of his true power, threatening and icy _(Like the catacombs etched in the scrolls she used to sift through,_ persona non grata, _sensei would say when he found her hunched over the ancient texts). _Nevertheless, in his shadowed gaze she imagined she could see the red wheels behind coal irises, waiting to spring on her, penetrate her, grasp the truth behind her nervous twitching. "The whole rookie nine is here, and the chuunin… They're practically spilling their nerves on the ground. If we're going to do something important, we need all the help we can get." The boy snorted, turning his head, and even in casual conversation, he held the air about him as if he had bested the blonde under discussion once again. "And it must be important, or they wouldn't have asked for _Naruto._ Now, _where the hell is he?" _His eyes were back on her face, roving across her smooth complexion, and her skin heated up despite the dreary cold around them.

"Sasuke, I-"

The boy cut into her with a frown like knives. "Hurry up," he hissed.

"Well, see-"

"Sakura." She stiffened for a moment before her mind registered where she had heard that voice behind her before. And not a moment too soon to spare her from Sasuke's interrogation.

"Kakashi sensei!" She smiled, partially in relief, but her mind and heart weren't in it. She could taste blood in the back of her throat, and ran an unconscious tongue over the puncture wound in her lip where she had bitten through the soft tissue in her nerves. Kakashi was smiling behind his mask, his eye light and cheery as always, but something in his voice gave way to another, stronger, emotion… what? Something she couldn't identify. Anger? It was definitely there. He was... mad at her? She froze in fear, the sudden impact of thinking bearing down on her.

Did he know? About Naruto? And, Kakashi sensei had _never_ shown up _on time._ Five minutes late maybe, but never _early._ And something in his voice was screaming unease.

"Come over here so we can talk?" His voice left no invitation for Sasuke, and the boy snorted in a little more than annoyance. It couldn't possibly be important, then, because, since when did Kakashi ever trust the distractible girl over him with the _important_ news? Sasuke turned away, though only as a dismissive gesture that wouldn't last more than a few seconds, and Sakura was left with no choice but to nod numbly. Though she didn't see her teammate's head swivel back to her, she could hear the aggravation in the movement.

They took an open path in silence through the forest that bordered the village, and though the massing bodies had disappeared behind the cover of the trees and evaporating fog, Sakura could still feel Sasuke's eyes lingering on her back. She imagined that they were red, and spinning out of control with his unique bloodline talent.

"Sensei, what is it?" She asked, if only to break the silence between them. Her stomach churned as she answered the question with any combination of responses in her head. Did he know? Did he guess? Or maybe did he know that she knew that he knew that-

"It's Naruto."

She flinched. There was a long pause, and Sakura realized the man had stopped walking several paces ago, so she turned, and was caught guiltily in his level gaze.

"Sensei, I don't know what- no, I mean, it's not like I could-" The hem of her red top was fraying where she had worried it with fingers too quick and nervous that day. A long cherry string unraveled, and she curled it unconsciously around her index finger, breaking it off, and letting it fall to the ground by her side.

"Calm down, Sakura." He smiled lightly, indulgently, tilting his head to the side as he motioned casually in the air with his hand. "Naruto is fine. In fact, I believe he's now residing with Iruka for the time being, but…there's something else we need to discuss. A…mission."

Sakura eyed him. So he did know, and what was worse was… that wasn't the least of what was bothering her, raising the fine hairs on the back of her neck.

Something was wrong with the scene. She hadn't spent all these unforgettable _years_ training under the jounin to not be able to recognize the discomfort he was displaying.

"A…mission?" she asked him skeptically, eying him doubtfully.

"You… won't like it, I know," he faltered, and she knew it was something bad. "but this time, I'm afraid I can't let you pass."

Sakura looked at him… _really_ looked into his visible eye, and what she found there was unnerving.

"What…just what _is_ this… mission, Sensei…?"

.o.

There was a knock on the door, and Iruka had barely left his seat beside the couch before the intruder welcomed himself in with a muffled, "Yo!"

"I don't know why you bother knocking, Kakashi," Iruka grumbled, annoyed, but not surprised at his colleague's sudden arrival. "At least you found the door this time."

"Naruto," Kakashi peered around his bristling associate, grinning cheerily as Naruto's mussed golden head slunk out of the mess of blankets on the couch.

"Meh…?"

The man raised an eyebrow, tugging his red-bound book from one of his pockets lazily. "There's someone outside…waiting for you." Turning a page and without looking up, Kakashi flapped a hand in the blonde's direction.

"I suggest you go clean up, and, please, get dressed."

"If it's Sasuke, I don't wanna see the bastard," Naruto mumbled almost incoherently, dropping his head solidly back to his pillows and completely disappearing again. "Kick him a good one for me though, and tell him he sucks."

"Very mature, I'm sure, but unless Sasuke-kun has sadly misplaced his-"

"Kakashi," Iruka warned, stepping away from his window, waving once more to the visitor before frowning disapprovingly in his partner's direction.

"Well, that is to say," the man continued shamelessly, "unless dear Sasuke suddenly grew some rather nicely rounded, if I do say so myself, and despite the rumor, very well tipped b-"

"_Kakashi, not in my house._" The chuunin was turning an indecent shade of tomotoe red when he finally managed, "Naruto, Sakura-chan is waiting outside for you."

.o.

"Sakura…"

She led him gracefully by the hand through the thickening trees, Naruto only a pace behind as he tried to straighten his aching back and ease his stiff and shuffled steps. He wanted to be smooth, cool and collected, seemingly intelligent to the pink haired girl. There was no way he was going to embarrass himself today. Not in front of Sakura-chan. So Naruto leveled his shoulders against the throbbing pain, _(Because Sakura-chan, you're so pretty today, don't you know?) _and opened his lips to ask her, _tell_ her, what was on his baffled mind.

She stopped suddenly, guiding him down to sit beside her on the mossy log beneath the foliage, her free hand resting on long slanted legs as she leaned a shoulder into him, though at the moment, he was unsure if he could hold even himself upright. He could feel the stitches in his side strain with the effort of supporting both their weight comfortably, and his fractured ribs protested the addition. Something itched in the back of his mind, something that told him… what? It was there, the answer, but it was gone with the brush of pink tresses against his cheek.

"S- Sakura…" He hated the way the shadows hid her eyes from him, because he had always loved to look at them, into them, and now that he had the chance, they were concealed from him.

Sakura-chan had invited him here, had given her permission of contact when she leaned into him, but for all the world, Naruto just couldn't think of what to do. Was an arm around the waist too much? His fingers twitched, but no, that couldn't be right, because none of the other teams held their girls like that. He wanted to cnvey friendship, not impure intentions. He'd try the shoulders, then, like friends, but, no- she'd think he was trying to make a move. He had to support himself with one hand on the log, so, what he he manage single-handed that would't be miconstrued?  
He sighed. Why couldn't girls be easy to understand like guys? If it had been Sasuke, he'd just have punched the cocky prick in the mouth (and probably get beaten in the ground, conciquentially) and they'd yell a bit, beat each other senseless, and somehow, at the end of the day, be closer.  
So Naruto lefthis hand in his lap.

The speckles of shadow and light cast by the swaying trees danced across their faces, illuminating and accentuating, then withdrawing and secreting. Naruto sighed, content to stay like this for the rest of the day, but-

"Naruto, I…" she lowered her head so her pretty pink hair covered her eyes again, then tossed it attractively over her shoulder, scooting closer to the confused boy. He could feel the heat rising were their legs touched, and he wondered vaguely if she knew what she was doing to him. This wasn't like her, not something he'd foresee in a million years, and the suspicious sensation rekindled somewhere in the depths of his mind. Some part that, with no logical reason why, he wanted to bury.

He wanted to ask her…everything. What they were doing here, why she had come, would she like to get something to eat later?, but he kept his mouth shut, because he could never open it around her without saying something stupid and wrong, always wrong... It was better to be silent then stupid, he decided sadly. Especially with Sakura-chan. As it was, she continued, taking no notice of the slight tremor that ran between the two of them. "…I wanted to apologize for…that night…" It was soft, her voice and her breath, as it tickled his neck below the ear, sending shivers down his spine. Gods, his hands were sweaty, his breath faltering at the sudden close contact…

"It's okay, Sakura-chan," he stammered out, his eyes wide as he looked down on the top of her head now resting against his chest, his heart sputtering in an attempt to stay calm. "R-really." Could she hear it? Hear how fast his heart was racing at her mere touch? "Wasn't your fault or anyth-"

And suddenly her lips collided with his, though it was never the first kiss he had expected…dreamed about…

It was cold and clumsy, dry and somewhat absent. Until he regained his senses and deepened it. He had no experience in this field, no knowledge of how people did it or what they liked, so he stumbled about her mouth, childish and sloppy, kissing against her pink glossed lips. At least, he thought dimly, at least he had done _something_ right today.

There was no surprise, no sudden gasp in alarm before he let his eyes slide close and his arms wrap around her, but then, maybe the shock had already set in.

This was what he was best at- thoughtless, mindless, and completely stupid actions.

Sakura tasted as good as she smelled. Like crushed flowers on the tip of his tongue as he eased her head back, large hand cupping her neck and supporting it gently.

Remembering they were only human, they pulled apart, and again, Naruto had the same nagging sense that something was terribly out of place. Not necessarily _wrong,_ but most definitely not right. And he ignored it, because, this was _now_, and his _now_ included _Sakura._ Something that he had always wanted, always dreamed of, right here, right now, in his arms. He _loved_ her, right?

He wasn't sure at what point he had taken one of her hands into his own, and now, he could feel a coolness radiating from her skin the same way that heat seemed to leave his.

"Sakura," he panted, unsure if this was the right thing to say… but he _had_ to. Now or never… "I… I want-"

And she had smiled. Only slightly, her thin lips pulled up at the corners, eyes still hidden, confining their emotions behind a cascade of pink hair, but it was still a smile, whether it reached her heart or not.

"I know, Naruto. I know."

He felt a cold hand slip under his shirt, teasing him in a way he never knew was possible. There was kissing and there was sex, but he never imagined there to be more to intimacy than just that.

She took control of the situation, whether because of his state of impassible shock, or because his body would not allow him to exert beyond the point of getting knocked off the log onto the dirt ground, he was never sure. And if Sakura wanted the top, Sakura got the top.

The dirt was rough against his chaffing skin, the grit working up the material of his shirt and rubbing against sore cuts and burns, stinging, but not demanding. She had him straddled, pinned against the ground with a leg on each side, and he flushed when- could she feel it? How could she _not?_- his lower body jutted harshly against her inner thigh.

He took in a short gasp of breath when she slid her hands lower, fumbling only slightly awkwardly with the button to his pants, hips rocking ever so slightly against him.

"Sakura, I don't know if…" Was it okay for him… to feel like _this_… for Sakura-chan while she was with him? It was okay if she knew how much his body enjoyed this, right? Wasn't this what she wanted?

He didn't know what to do. Naruto had never been good at communication, especially around his pink haired friend, and he doubted there had ever been a time around her when his talking didn't result in a fist in the face. Or elsewhere.

So he said nothing.

If the stiffness against her inner leg was no indication, she would know how he had reacted to the situation if she went any-

He looked expectantly at her face for any sign of disgust, heart jittering in his chest, but found something there he had not been expecting. She looked sad, smiling as if she regretted something terribly, but knew there was no way around it. And through the haze in his mind, he finally realized what was so wrong with the situation.

"Sa-" he cleared his throat when the only sound that emitted sounded more like a gasp than a word. "Sakura."

But she didn't stop. And he didn't want her to. He _wanted_ her to lean over him like that while she tugged the band of his boxers lower on his body, while she pressed herself closer to him as she moved a slow and distracting dance against his groin, but-

"Sakura, I- I can't. I can't do this."

Naruto grabbed her shoulders, gently steering her off his body, pushing her to the side a little rougher than he had intended as he propped himself above her, panting slightly, and eyes a little to wide.

"I thought you wanted-" Sakura looked slightly hurt at his refusal of her, but the boy looked grimly down on his companion, _his_ heart aching, to see the relief etched in her features.

"I did. Still do." But when she attempted to push him back down to the ground to finish where they had left off, he pushed right back, even in his weakened state, overpowering her with muscle alone. "But you don't. Sakura. I'm not going to let you do something you're obviously terrified of doing, just to make me feel good." He smiled sadly at her, shrugging his shoulders. "I told you, it wasn't your fault what happened last time, and it's not the first time it's been done, so forget it." The blonde withdrew his hands that he had pinned the girl before him with, not wanting to bruise her with his weight. "All I want…" he stood up, righting his clothes and offering her a hand before pulling her into a light hug, barely whispering into her ear, "…is your friendship."

He wanted more, his still aroused state already proof enough, but he wanted it only if she was _willing_. And he felt warm liquid spilling onto his neck, instinctively pulling his friend closer to his body.

"Thank you, Naruto."

Something behind the two rustled in the brush, but the blonde had more important matters than chasing after small animals, or looking at a spot that the wind had brushed past thousands of times that day. Sakura, however, stiffened, pulling the fabric of her friend's black shirt into a crushing grasp between her fingers.

"Dun worry, Sakura-chan," he muttered drowsily into her hair, but she began to shake uncontrollably, eyes wide in horror.

"..n" She was choking up, guilt and fear wracking her small frame. "Run," she whispered, then pushed him brutally away and screamed at him. "Run, Naruto!"

"Sakura, what-"

"Don't. Move." He could feel it, the razor tip of a kunai placed skillfully under his chin, rubbing uncomfortably against his skin with every shallow breath he took.

And then he saw them. Saw them _all_ as they relinquished their hiding positions around the small clearing, the ANBU, completely surrounding them. Sakura wouldn't look him in the eye, muttering into her small balled up hands, tears streaming through white clenched fingers.

"Wasn't planning on it," the blonde muttered defiantly to who he assumed was a man behind him. "Sakura?" The girl was still shaking her head, not appearing to be in any sort of immediate danger from the unidentifiable ninja around them. And there was that sickly poisonous voice in his head that told him he'd been betrayed.

Again.

Then a whisper in his ear again, unfamiliar, but they all sounded alike to him. All the people who would never in their lives understand him, no matter how they pretended. The bystanders. The higher ups, always judging him from afar.

"Move forward. Don't try to run; you're surrounded," the voice commanded, and he wasn't surprised that there was humor there; a sick pleasure in their position over him. Really, he thought that the days of his village hunting him down like an animal were over, that they had finally gotten bored and moved on. Small "payback" he understood, but full armed Anbu seemed a bit much for petty revenge.

They had him steered and stumbling down the path before he could find a witty enough remark for the situation.

"Sakura-chan," he mumbled instead, the only sure thing about this night, not sure if it was worry for the girl, or simply a plea, asking her- anyone- to tell him that she wasn't a part of this- whatever it was. That, he was sure he could handle, but there was nothing but a muffled sob and something that might have been an apology. Sniffling and- "Kakashi-sensei _promised..."_

Naruto hissed when they stopped at the edge of a large clearing, and in an instant, he was alert, muscles trembling beneath his skin. Something, something more than just these men in black and white milling about, was _wrong._ His senses, the five of them, and the sixth one lent to him by Kyuubi that warned him of danger, were prickling, sent into a hyper sensitive state, and there was a fuzzy static in his ears as he looked around him.

Something was coming.

A rough hand pushed him up against one of the many oaks in the forest, fingers lacing between blonde locks, preventing him from struggling, _(As if!) _as another large hand pinned both his wrists to his back. The bark of the tree tasted like earth and mold, and he spat little bits of it back to the ground, but was pressed closer to the wood, the bumps making painful indents in his skin.

The body behind him was jerking with small peals of laughter.

He could feel the needle enter his neck at the largest vein with a sharp prick, hissing at the sting, even once it was removed. He let out a laugh, loud and mocking, and behind the faceless wooden masks around him, he could smell their confusion. It tasted slightly like fear.

"You know, those don't work on me." He grinned savagely into the oak, not in the least affected by the contents that had been contained in the now empty syringe. It wasn't like people hadn't done this before; tried to poison him, to "put him down" when he wasn't aware. Oh, it had happened thousands of times since he was a kid, and he had learned to laugh at their stupidity, their complete ingnorance and baffled expressions every time he stood back up and brushed himself off. It was a waste of time, since Kyuubi would nullify it milliseconds after it hit his system.

"Oh, but it does," a voice whispered in his ear. The heat and moisture from the breath was making him sick, and he was sorely tempted to rub the abused skin on his shoulder to rid himself of the discomfort. "In fact, it's specially _designed_ for you." The hand released his head, gripped onto the teen cruelly at the arm, skin pinching under firm fingers, leaving black marks that faded to tan, then turned black and purple again, the bruises and swelling fading and reviving by the second. Naruto stepped back, away from the tree, and the person behind him mimicked his movements. Using Naruto's shoulder as a focal point, the figure slowly circled the blonde, coming to a full stop only when he was positioned directly in front of the boy.

"So?" he spat back, hating this feeling of inability. "What can it even _do_ to me?" He laughed harshly, bitterly emphasizing every word. "It's not like I have anything more to lose." Naruto shot a nasty glance at Sakura, ambling listlessly from side to side a distance off, but she had never even lifted her head, for fear of meeting his eyes. She stood silently watching the ground, pink hair slightly frazzled in anticipation of the lightning storm that threatened to fall around them until out of the corner of his eye, he watched a jounin steer her away.

Stupid girl.

"Do? Well, I guess you could say it would… '_heighten your awareness',_ no?" He pinned the boy with his cold gaze and cruel smirk, whitened hair spilling over his leaf headband.

"Mizuki, that's enough." Another figure had moved from the darkness, standing head and shoulders above the smaller man.

"_Kakashi._ Funny, really, that they put _me_ in charge of handling the demon brat, and not _you," _he sneered. "Seeing how you have absolutely no say in the going on's around here, I highly suggest that you leave before you complicate matters further." The man smirked, and there was no humor in his eyes, just as there was no humor in his pinching words and rough gestures.

"Your mission was to administer the shot, not to bully the recipient. Now back your men off, he's not going anywhere." The masked man relaxed a little, looking blandly at his nails as if inspecting them for dirt. "Unless you're concerned he's _too much for you?_"

"Certainly not," Mizuki snapped, and waved disgustedly at the jounin that had the clearing encircled. They immediately retreated further into the trees, loosing their tight circle formation.

"Sensei…?"

But Sakura wasn't the only one who would not look the blonde in the eyes, and he felt a certain anger burning in the pit of his stomach. It rose, snaking through him, and he was suddenly overwhelmed with the unreasonable desire to lash out at the man. To rake his nails through flesh, rip apart his limbs and-

"Fall back!"

The echoes of tens of men shouting over his feral snarl seemed to wash out all compassionate feelings in the boy.

Not much to wash out, at the moment.

"Sorry, Naruto," the man murmured, also drawing away in a swiftness that somehow suited him. "Just following orders." And then he was gone, too, and Naruto was alone in the clearing with a hundred anxious eyes peering at him like a display case of valueable vipers.

He hadn't realized, until his mouth was frothing red, and his nails were biting holes into his palms, that he was _loosing control_.

"Foolish mortals," a voice inside him seemed to purr, and it was only because it was the only sound in the forest besides the patter of rain, that he knew he had said it aloud. The men were backing away, their mad retreat pulled down to slow motion, as if they were afraid any sudden movements would cost them their lives.  
Maybe it would.  
Maybe, the boy thought frightfully, maybe it wouldn't matter, and he'd slaughter the whole forest by nightfall.

Naruto spun about, willing himself to change back, panic lacing his actions as he tried to contain the red chakra that was starting to seep through his pores…

But it was useless.

"Please," he whined through elongated canines, because he could still _feel_ the others around him, _watching_ him, and he could smell their fear. He could smell the sweet sweat rolling off their bodies, even through the down pouring rain, and he could smell the sweat of the approaching nin, foreign with murderous intent, but most of all, overpowering everything else, and heightening the feeling of betrayal, he picked up the unique odor of someone far closer to the heart than Sakura could ever be.

"Iruka…sensei?" The rain seemed to drain the red chakra in his eyes, and they wavered in brilliant violet shades as he tried to remember his humanity. "Please… don't let me do this… I don't want to…kill…" The bloodlust beat in his mouth and ears, drowning out the strengthening rain.

Iruka froze, his body shaking, and his legs telling him to run back to the boy, hold him until he wasn't scared anymore, and his mind wasn't telling him anything different. So, what was holding him back?

He remembered the days that he had despised Naruto, that the thought of him in his classroom was almost worth resigning or transferring, and even now, despite the way he had come to love the boy, _(Like a father, he told himself, because Naruto only needed a father-figure in Iruka) _he was still terrified to move.

Gentle but firm hands locked around his waist, and a murmur in his ear, "Wait, Iruka. There's nothing we can do about this now. He'll be fine."

The chuunin wasn't soothed by the words.

"Kakashi, let me go." He was starting to panic, his voice rising higher and higher, and some of the others looked at him with a mixture of pity and understanding. But they wouldn't know! They didn't _know_ Naruto! Only _he_ would ever completely appreciate the boy for who he was, and now they were trying to keep him from protecting the child; forget that he had been hesitant about going in the first place. "Kakashi, you don't understand, he's never- he's not _ready!_"

The pieces of the puzzle were starting to fall into place in Iruka's mind, and with every perfect fitting, he grew deeper into a mindless panic and depair. Pawns. They were all pawns.

"I understand that," Kakashi murmured, and something about the statement was off, making Iruka feel sick to his bones with something he couldn't name. "But it's Hokage's orders, and we're all sworn to obey them." There was a thoughtful pause in which Iruka was desperately trying to break, and Kakashi mulling over his choices. He seemed to have reached some decision or other, because the hands holding his comrade back were removed, and he spoke with a sullen edge to his voice. "Besides, Iruka, he won't remember this when he wakes up."

The brunette snapped around, his ponytail slapping wetly against his neck as beads of water ran down the sides of his cheeks like tears.

"What do you mean?" He was too curious now, too worried that Kakashi had implied the boy's death in his words, but the man raised his hands, a smile stretching the fabric of his soaked mask.

"That was apart of the deal we made," he said calmly, and Iruka found himself _wanting _to listen. Wanting to believe that everything would be okay, and they could really pretend like nothing had happened. Kakashi had to be right. Naruto wouldn't remember anything. Not what Sakura had done, or what he himself had failed to do. "There's a remedy that's mixed in there... along with the agent that drives out the demon's power- it forces a short term memory loss on the recipient. The most he'll forget are a few days, and you can just tell him he hit his head, or something. Really, with him, that's the norm." Kakashi attempted a smile, but a loud ripping from the clearing caught both their attentions.

Iruka drew in a quick breath, and he felt a hand squeezing his shoulder, whether in reassurance or to hold him back, he wasn't sure.

It was Naruto, or really, _not_ Naruto, that was slicing through the vest of an attacking mist nin, (When had they even gotten here this fast? He had completely missed their approach) and the bloodlust in the teen's eyes sent shivers down the men's spines. Iruka tried not to think that this was Naruto only a hundred feet from him; Naruto, with blood on his hands and a sick smile on his face.

There was only so much one could prepare for.

The chuunin didn't realize he was hyperventilating on the spot until his knees grew weak without oxygen to his brain. He was positive that the hand on his shoulder was the only thing that was keeping him from toppling over to the ground.

"Iruka. Look at me."

It wasn't a request, and even if it had been, there was no way that the man could say no. He was too numb to think for himself, and though he knew from all the classes, all the lectures he had given and received, that he was going into shock, he was helpless to stop it. So he turned around.

And stood transfixed, his world spinning in a haze of red and black, and felt as though he were lost in a timeless tunnel, with no desire to find the bright light at the end.

"No…fair…" he muttered drowsily as the jounin's sharingan spun him deeper into a calmness that he otherwise would never have achieved. He hadn't even been aware that the other man had lowered his mask. Maybe he should sharpen up on his perceptiveness… maybe later, when he wasn't so tired…

"Iruka." He was vaguely aware of Kakashi talking steadily beside him, but felt his attention wandering to the clashing sounds behind him in the clearing, and a voice that he _knew _he should know, but couldn't seem to place.

The voice was calling for shadow clones, he caught on, and there seemed to be a hunger, or a deep thirst in that voice that was being forcefully repressed, he knew he _should_ know, and he wondered lethargically if that person was as arrogant and devious as he sounded.

But something else in his mind told him not to judge a person by anything other than their personality. Hadn't he learned that a long time ago? …but where?

A voice, not Kakashi's, called out nearby in something akin to wonder, "Look at that demon _move!_ I've never seen anything _like_ it before!"

Naruto was a demon. In fact, Iruka could now remember that Naruto didn't _want_ to be a demon, so that should make him a good person, right? Naruto was never an exemplary student, but all that potential he had with his Kage Bun-

"Naruto!" Iruka spun around on his heels as his foggy mind caught up with him, and the sharingan's effect was instantly severed. For a minute, he wavered, trying to gain control over his body and his mind at the same time, and there was a disapproving click behind him.

"I'm fine, Kakashi," he said, though he refused to turn around, just in case the other man had in mind to put him under again. "I need to be awake."

In the field, the demon was practically drinking in the blood of the invading Mist nin, allowing the liquid to course down his throat as he pulled his blades out of his opponents.

Iruka shuddered as a peal of laugher sounded as an exploding tag ended the lives of a few more of the enemy, and there was no doubt that this wasn't Naruto.

The chuunin froze when the demon dove a hand into his weapons holster, and pulled nothing out. Naruto, in whatever form, was out of ammunition. He was ready to cry out, ready to run out and fight side by side with the vessel, no mind that Naruto was unconscious somewhere in the subconscious of the monster out there, when the demon found an excellent use of his overgrown claws and teeth.

A few of the Leaf nin retched quietly, the rest looking pale and sickly as the boy tore through throat after throat, disemboweling another with a quick swipe to the abdomen.

And then it was silent.

There were more, that much was obvious in the flash of the headbands where the trees grew thickest, but they appeared to be retreating, pulling back to formulate some plan to take this monster down.

Or maybe, to disappear for good.

The blonde teen dropped to the ground, growling as he clutched his head between clawed hands, struggling with some internal conflict. Naruto. It was Naruto, fighting for control of his body.

"Naruto…"

As if the teen heard him, red eyes flashed over the trees, settling uncomfortably on the chuunin. And suddenly, they weren't a blazing red anymore.

Iruka had never seen them shift that fast, usually taking minutes to fade from purple to blue, but the change was instantaneous, and with the sky blue eyes, there came a dawning horror on the blonde.

Iruka felt his heart go out to the boy.

Naruto looked down at his raw and bloody hands, and the way the crimson liquid seemed to roll off his skin like sweat on a summer day, and his eyes widened further in shock and despair.

"Sensei," he whispered, innocent eyes looking into Iruka's brown gaze, feeling the weight of the dead bodies surrounding them. It was as if a connection had been formed, and the pain seemed to flow from the boy into the chunnin, and the shock flowed right back. "Sensei, please. Help me."

There was an exhaustion that seemed to come from every part of Naruto's being. Even his soul seemed tired and drained, and Iruka wanted to run up and protect _his child_ from any of the harm or images that this forest was spreading.

"Please… I want to go home." He looked down at his hands again, inching away from what might have been a severed finger or toe, then retching to the side until his stomach was empty.

The men were regrouping in the background, but Naruto's eyes remained a deeper, if not duller, shade of blue. Iruka hoped that when his memories were gone, his eyes would shine again, because he hated to think of a day without them laughing back at him.

I'm sorry! Iruka wanted to yell. I wanted to help you! What can I do? But surprisingly, the words that ran up his throat and through his numb lips were nothing he or the boy had expected.

"You never should have fought the demon's control, Naruto." You should have waited to come back out.

He was positive, before the blonde turned to confront the remaining numbers, that the boy had mouthed a response.

"I know," he seemed to say.

And then there was the clash of blade on blade. The shadow clones were fewer and more sickly, spreading themselves out too widely, and disappearing to quickly. It was impossible to think that this boy had slaughtered the men around him only moments before, watching him parry blows and disregard openings to kill.

The man he was fighting, Naruto was exceptionally aware of the height difference, was pressing down on him, and he felt the demon stirring again in his belly.

"No," he whispered, trying to push the chakra inside him down, and the man laughed.

He was on the defense, his moves sluggish, his attacks weak and halfhearted, and both of them were completely aware of it. He wouldn't kill, couldn't kill, not when he didn't have to.

And then, the opening practically landed in his lap.

It must have been the reflection off his Leaf headband that had momentarily blinded his opponent, or rain in his eyes that opened up a brief window of time. It might have been a gift from one of the gods that had finally felt a pity for him, and gave him a second chance. Maybe it was his reward for fighting back all these years against the terror of the village inside him.

Maybe.

In a swift ark, Naruto brought his blade under the man's chin, slipping under a bulky arm, and pulling back against the nin's wide neck with the crook of his own slender arm. It would have been a comical sight, Naruto piggy-back riding the giant of a man in the pouring rain, if it wasn't a life or death situation.

"G-give up," he stammered, not knowing what to do from here, and not entirely willing to end this man's life. He was maybe somebody's husband, maybe a father or a brother, and always, always, somebody's son, and there was no way that Naruto was going to take away a person's family, like his had been taken from him. He might be a good father or loving husband, and just because their villages had tossed them up against eachother, didn't make him a bad person, _right? _Who was he to think that he could judge whether or not this man lived?

But the man laughed.

It was a deep and throaty sound, unpleasant, and rough, like grinding rocks against sandpaper. In his voice was a humorous malice, and _no fear._

"What will you do, boy? Will you kill me?" The man slammed his back, and Naruto with it, against the trunk of a nearby tree, trying to dislocate the clinging boy, and laughing when the blond teen hissed in pain. The blade shook at the mist nin's throat, potentially deadly, as a thick hand wrapped around the wrist that anchored the blonde down. He barely felt it snap.

"I- I'm- I'm _sorry!"_ Naruto screamed, dragging the kunai across the skin and toward himself, still clinging to the man's vest as blood soaked the collar around the nearly detached head. It was never the way he imagined his first kill; no pride, no joy, just a sick feeling in the pit of his stomach that he had ended another human's life.

Iruka watched in abject horror as Naruto fell with the man, tears streaming down his darkly whiskered cheeks, and for once, he longed for the defiant little boy Naruto had been.

The shadow clones vanished rapidly in small trademark poofs of vapor, while the real Naruto sat back on his heels and wailed.

"Naruto," the chuunin choked, watching the remainder of the now unencumbered nin turn as a whole on his student. They hesitated for a moment, indecisive as Naruto rubbed red-rimmed eyes against his dirtied sleeve, trailing leaves and grit in a grimy line across his face, but they faltered for only a second before individually drawing their gleaming weapons. Iruka's heart slammed against his ribcage, and for a moment, his vision blurred as his took in heavy gasps of forest air. "Naruto! Behind-" but the boy had already turned, and before the chuunin could finish his sentence, the first lifeless opponent was bleeding on the floor. When Naruto turned back to look at him, smiling sickly, Iruka was staring into his blood-red eyes and a supercilious smile not meant for the child's warm features.

.o.

"It's… done, Hokage-sama."

Kakashi was shaking quite visibly when he returned with his verbal report, despite his stiff tone and hardened expression. The Hokage missed nothing.

"And Naruto?"

The jounin snarled, finally losing control as his temper lashed out like a whip, the wood of the table between them splintering under his fingers. "Still in the clearing, crying because he changed back before the demon was done, because he's fifteen, and he just slaughtered five men." In an uncharacteristic display of anger, the man upset the table on its side, pacing back and forth in the room as he tried to harness his fury. The urge to rip down his mask and wield the sharingan eye against the patient leader quelled as he took in deep breaths of the recycled stale air. "Your _backup_ was great," he finally ground out sullenly, coming to a halt in the middle of the office. "_Twenty five shinobi_, and they couldn't find the nerve to help a comrade." He spat angrily, bitterly, and looked back at the other man, hoping his glare reached the man's heart. Maybe he could see what he'd done.

"Kakashi…" The older shinobi sighed deeply, opened and closed his mouth like a carp out of water, and then, quietly, sadly, "you're dismissed." If the jounin had stayed only a second longer, he might have seen the tears in the elder's eyes.

.o.

**A/n- So? Reviews are to me what blood is to kyuubi. He gets nicer later, really. :-) Just a warning, there _will_ be some Iruka/Naruto next chappy, but nothing really bad. Sorry for those of you waiting for mindless sex. :-) (It's more of a Kyuubi/Iruka, but he really doesn't know that. Poor guy.)  
Weisst du? Ich spreche Deutsch jetzt und weiss ich nicht, _wie. _Ich bin gewacht auf und verstehe ich Deutsch yetzt! Es ist** **sooooo komisch! (Aber genial!) ---that by no means makes is _correct,_ but man, this is cool. :-p**


	6. Nothing anymore

Man, if he could only just reach that bowl of ramen…

'.o.'  
-+.:Nothing To Lose:.+-  
'.o.'

º¤ø,¸¸,ø¤ºº¤ø,¸¸ º¤ø,¸¸,ø¤ºº¤ø  
**The sticks and stones,  
****They break my bones,  
****And still,  
****The words, they hurt me.  
**º¤ø,¸¸,ø¤ºº¤ø,¸¸ º¤ø,¸¸,ø¤ºº¤ø

**-Chapter Six-**

It was raining, the water positively jumping up from the ground in muddy splashes, hurling the dark liquid body against the blonde's skin in dirty patches as he chanced a glance towards his academy teacher, still standing stock still among the others at the edge of the clearing. Kakashi was back at the chunnin's side, a hand gripping the other man's shoulder, and Naruto was struck with the sudden urge to know if he was speaking behind that concealing mask of his.  
Speaking about him.  
About the monster.

"Sensei," he rasped through bloody lips, voice hoarse and spent, laced with the exhaustion he could feel a little too deeply within his bones, and both teachers stiffened slightly, shaken, and vaguely wide eyed.

Neither of them stepped forward.

It was eerily quiet but for the mad patter of silver rain and the occasional retching noises from the cover of the trees; Kyuubi had not only done his job, but he had pleasured in making the moments of death gruesomely unique and _artistic_, he might say, leaving the pink intestines and gray matter spread against every surface within a fourth of a mile.

On some of the trees, there were articles of personal belongings; headbands impaled through their metal bodies, masks with pieces of their owners still attached, and even the shine of a gold and silver ring that gave a touch of personality to the faceless corpses around it.

"Sensei," he tried again, and unexpectedly, the pony tailed man flinched.

Naruto jerked fractionally. He knew he could never expect even Iruka to completely trust him- Kyuubi had done a splendid job of recreating the chuunin's most traumatic memory- but it still sent needles of pain splintering into his chest to see it so blatantly laid out on the man's face. This was history repeating itself before their eyes, and after all, what was preventing this from happening again? Maybe next time inside the village, against his own companions? What if they used him again, used him to dispose of the enemy, and he turned on his imprisoners instead? Naruto couldn't blame them for trapping the demon inside of him, he would have volunteered if he had been able, but the monster in question was an entity of revenge, and not only was there a chance of Kyuubi finishing his unfinished business from thirteen years past, but it was very sickeningly possible.  
Now _everyone_ had seen what he could become, what he was capable of doing, what was lurking beneath his skin.

And Iruka must hate him.

"Dammit," he whispered to himself, clenching and unclenching his bloodied fists, trying not to remember all of the times that Iruka had given him… _everything_… and repaying him now with a splendid show of carnage and utter destruction.

His small torn hands finally settled, balled into fists at his sides, (_and in the drying blood beneath his nails, there're a hundred names)_ and suddenly, he jerked. The red fire picked up in his veins, stung like a lattice work of poison through his body, and in the dim light that filtered through the rain, he snarled. It was so inhuman, so unprovoked and unexpected, and when the closest nin around him dropped like stones to the floor before their hands could ball around their ears, Naruto could hear the demon laughing hysterically in his mind.

So he did what any frightened fifteen year old boy would do, stood up, and ran. He had half expected the group of nin to pursue him, to track him down and hunt him like some sort of game animal, but even a mile away, there was nothing but the rain, and his muddy footprints in the ground.

.o.

They were organizing search groups. Nobody had volunteered, (_why bother?)_ and, really, nobody cared what happened to the demon brat anyway. But the Hokage's word, whatever and however, was law.

The effects of the medication, he had said, were unknown, and it was to be assumed at all times that Naruto could change back at any given moment. He was unstable. Dangerous. Possibly under so much stress as to be crazy. He might attack them, but, (_and he would say this with one poised finger and an air of pain)_ it wasn't his fault, so, don't _kill_ him.

Kakashi wasn't _quite_ shaking with rage, not _exactly_ glaring at the old man who had arrived for this speech in the clearing, and not _really_ fingering his kunai holster in agitation, because he knew his place (no matter how he wanted so deeply to break it).

"Anbu only," the Hokage continued. "Treat it as the highest caliber mission. The rest of you," he tried not to look at the torn bodies, some cut cleanly in half and spilling their contents into the bloodied dirt, "have clean up." He turned to leave, but Iruka was at his side in an instant, gripping an aged arm to get the man's attention. He immediately released the robes when the man turned sharply to face him.

"Hokage-sama, let me go talk to him," he whispered urgently, ignoring the arched brow of the other. "I can bring him back." _Like the first time, when he stole the scroll of sealing, remember?,_ he might have added, had it been anyone other than that Hokage, but it went unspoken between the two of them.

"I'm sorry, Iruka." The leader looked it, but it just _wasn't enough_. Iruka stared at him in ill-concealed disbelief and rude anger. "He may revert under emotional stress for all we know, and we just can't risk having you there." The man paused, giving the younger man a look that might have implied a deeper knowledge of feelings Iruka really didn't want known, interjecting only when the chuunin made a movement to speak. "He's very attached to you, Naruto is," the Hokage murmured fondly, "If anything were to happen…" He spread his arms wide, a regal shrug, or just an old confused man trying to do the best he could for his village. "I'm sorry."

And then he was gone.

"_Dammit!"_ Iruka slammed a curled fist against the nearest oak trunk, and it shuddered under the impact, hunks of bark crumbling away to reveal a hand shaped indent.

"I know," Kakashi muttered darkly beside him, staring pointedly at the damaged tree. "He has the same effect on me." Iruka glared at him, then sighed, resting his head against the oak.

"Tell me, Kakashi, what do I do?"

The jounin took out and flipped open his infamous book, though his eyes didn't move to follow the printed kanji on the page. "You know, Iruka, they say that those who go against rules, especially the Hokage's who has final say in, well, everything, are nothing but scum. _But,_" he held up a finger to silence his friend, looking up from the pretty inked paper and holding Iruka with his hard stare. "Those who abandon their friends are worse than scum." He shrugged, the gravity of the moment capsized in a flash and a select few words. "At least, that's what I'm trying to teach the little runts, but I'm thinking they need a few more lessons."

When he looked back up from the page, Iruka, as expected, had left. Kakashi smiled, (the man was so predictable) and with a small snap, the book was in his pocket, and he was following his comrade through the thick of the forest. The air against his face was cool, despite the heat and intensity of the day, drops of rain leaking down the creases of his brow to drip vexingly against the skin of his neck.

"Sensei, what _happened?_" Sakura fell in stride beside her teacher, Sasuke quietly flanking the man's opposite side, looking for all the world like he wanted to speak, but deciding the situation was already turning in his favor. Better to not disrupt it now.

"Well, Sakura, that all depends on how much you saw right now." He gave her a crooked smile and a halfhearted chortle that rattled in his throat a second too long.

"Sensei?"

"What I mean is, did you see Naruto turn into the Nine Tailed Fox, slaughter just about everyone within a hundred plus yards, change back to promise everyone he wouldn't kill again, just in time to revert back to the monster and massacre everyone in sight?" He peeked a stealthy look at the girl who's jaw had rudely flopped open, then turned back to watch the night unfold before him, bounding from tree limb to tree limb effortlessly. "In that case, I'd tell you that he's managed to spook himself away, and we're currently chasing him down to ensure that he doesn't fall into the wrong hands tonight." Despite the situation, he couldn't help but tease his pupils, especially when Sasuke looked ready to drop with surprise. He had always wondered what the surly teen would think when confronted with the truth about his rival. Then again, Sasuke was smart. He thought he knew.

They wouldn't remember it in the morning anyway.

"He _what?_" Sakura gasped, shocked at her teacher's not only indifferent, but slightly humorous features.

"Oh?" he chuckled, and the two glared from either side of him. "I mean, _Sakura-chan,_ what a silly thing to ask. We're playing hide-and-seek with Uzumaki. First one to catch up with Iruka-sensei wins!"

"You're useless, sensei."

.o.

He knew he should never have chosen this place to hide. Iruka-sensei would know, would find him, would try to help, and he-

Naruto didn't think he could handle it if he hurt the gentle chuunin when he lost control. He hadn't even wanted to stop running. The pouring rain washed away the heat from his body, quelling the fiery demon inside his belly until it was only an angry murmur in his mind. No, the rain was good, but despite dreams of courageous self sacrifice and dazzling gallantry, Naruto wasn't ready to abandon his only home, to leave Konoha forever to spare them from the demon, too afraid of losing the only thing he had left, even if his presence was a heavy burden on the village. Too damn scared. Like a baby, he told himself harshly, but his legs slowed to a trot, then a walk, finally stopping inches from the rotting shack.

Back to where it all started.

He traced soft fingers in the dead wood of the wall, sodden hair clinging to his neck and losing the battle to stay upright and spiky. Iruka had saved him here, what, three, four years ago? Protecting him from betraying his village, and consequentially, death. Funny, how he had ever doubted Iruka's firm intentions, kind voice, gentle touch. Funny that he had to run away from the man even now. His fingertips graced the indents where, once upon a time, kunai had pinned his academy teacher, and he himself had learned what he was.

Naruto snorted, dragging his body tiredly through the creaking door, only vaguely wondering if the flooring would hold out on him. Uncaring, he threw himself to the cold ground, tossing an arm over his eyes to wait out the effects of the medication. The stirrings in his belly were becoming more insistent, provoking him, growing at him, demanding release upon those who had wronged them.

Sakura had set him up, his teachers, _both_ _his teachers_, had abandoned him, and now, _now_ was the time he could extract revenge. He could pretend to be better, spend the night with Iruka, then, in the dead of the night, pull out a concealed kunai and-

"_NO, dammit!"_

The entire building shuddered as his small fists slammed into the wall, the crimson in his eyes gradually ebbing to purple, then slowly regaining their blue hues once more. Somewhere from the labyrinth of his murky damp mind, the demon howled with laughter.

"Never," he gasped, panting so hard his ribs stung. "Never, not to Iruka-sensei…_never_…" He didn't know who he was trying to convince.

"**Soon, Kit. Soon."**

"Not now, not ever you manipulative son of a bitch," he muttered back, mentally slamming another door against the massive sealed cage. He wrapped a hand protectively around his heaving ribs, glaring from beneath his bangs. "Go rot."

"Naruto…?"

Naruto nearly jumped out of his skin, spinning so quickly that he lost his balance, falling unceremoniously on his back and scrambling away from the voice.

"Go away," he wheezed, voice hoarse with fear, because if there was _anyone_ he did _not_ want to see, it was Iruka.

"Naruto," the man said, strained and cracking with what Naruto wanted to imagine was concern for him. "Naruto, I want to help you."

"Go _away._" Naruto pulled his upper lip back, revealing a set of elongated canines, then snapping it back in place, too late to try and hide the evidence of his guilty nature. "I'll kill you." He didn't intend it as a threat so much as a warning to the man, but he could see the immediate impact of his words- hesitation and the fear that crossed the chuunin's eyes as he hovered uncertainly in the doorway, dripping mud and water into a growing puddle at his feet.

For a moment, neither of them spoke, Naruto trying his best to glare the man away from his hideout, willing him to understand that he couldn't possibly go back to the village when the demon was just out of reach, slaughter on its one track mind. Finally, Iruka shrugged.

"Fine then," he said easily, trying to suppress the shivers running up and down his spine as he tried to count the telltale signs of the demon in the boy. Deep whisker marks. Violent purple eyes. _Bloodlust._ "But I'm still staying here with you." He offered a slight smile to the boy, dropping his soggy vest to the ground on his way towards the wall Naruto has pushed himself up against, and slid down it, coming to a relaxed sitting position next to his student.

"Sensei-"

"Nah," the man cut him off, smiling to show that he wasn't angry. "We'll talk about it later, but right now, why don't we talk about something else, yeah?" Smalltalk while dancing with death. Risky, but maybe the only chance at surviving a sure demise. Naruto grabbed the lure.

"Well, I have been wondering…" He hesitated for a fraction of a second before rushing on. "How did you become a chuunin, sensei? I've never actually seen you fight in, you know, missions and stuff. Just lecture a lot. And yell."

The chuunin studied the patterns of rot and mold on the floor between his bent knees, trying to hold back his laughter, because Naruto seemed serious and honestly curious.

"Well, it was actually-"

This time, when the door slammed open, Naruto really wasn't prepared. He had jumped to his feet before the handle hit the wall, and wavered. For a moment, he was caught in Kakashi's sharingan gaze, dizzy and nauseous as it spun the room in circles…

Iruka caught him before he hit the floor.

"Naruto…?" He somehow pulled his eyes from the spinning red and black waves to focus hazily on the patch of pink peering from behind his jounin teacher's vest.  
So he had been wrong. Iruka wasn't the worst person that could possibly show up at a time like this.

He could hear the blood rushing to his head, pounding so insistently in his wrists and neck that he thought he might explode in a colorful display of crimson and gold.

She shouldn't be here. What was she _doing _here? Didn't they _realize?_ Didn't they understand that they'd thrown this all into jeopardy by bringing her here tonight? If there was one emotion forbidden to him at the moment, it was anger- calling to and feeding the demon inside of him, weakening all the defenses he had tried so hard to build.

But it was already too late.

"_**Finally, **_**Kit. Let's play."**

**.o.**

For a moment, there was utter silence. It was debatable, what first hurled Kakashi against the opposite wall, and at the same time slammed the single door shut with such fiery impact that the walls about them rattled, but when it was over, Naruto was standing alone in the middle of the room, surrounded by what was undeniably nine pluming tails of crimson chakra.

"Oh, Kit," the blackened lips crooned while the tails thrashed around them, forcing the others flat against the walls to avoid being burned. "It's been so long… so very, _very_ long."

An ethereal glow was gathering around the boy's body, his maniacal charcoal grin illuminated in the pulsing red glare of the tails, and when he lifted his dancing eyes to the room, they were a hard laughing blood red.

The room erupted into action.

It was Kakashi first, dodging the wreathing tails with a precision only afforded to him by the blazing sharingan glare that trained on each curling fiber, finally coming to a breathy halt before his shaken students.

"Sakura, Sasuke." The man didn't look behind himself to see if they had heard over laughter and creaking wood, instead following Iruka's every movement as the chuunin hurled seal after seal at the demon.  
He was only borrowing time none of them had.

"The entire building's encased in chakra- some kind of molded barrier." He shook his head, and Sasuke might have thought it was in awe that his teacher did so, but since when did the great Hatake Kakashi find _anything_ that surprising? The palms of his hands itched with anticipation. "It's strong," he continued, a hopeful note of triumph edging his voice, "but not unbreakable."

"Kakashi-" There was a sharp warning in Iruka's urgent call; the demon was losing patience with their game. The jounin quickened his words, fingers twitching distractedly as he spoke.

"You'll make it out to the forest, and from there, Sakura, remember the signs I showed you for summoning?" The girl nodded numbly. "Good. I don't care who or what you bring, just get the Hokage here in person." Another nod, and determined tightening of fingers around steel.

"When I give the signal, aim for directly below the window. Sasuke, give it maybe five meters, and chidori should do the rest." Kakashi finally glanced back at his genin, and a fraction of a second passed before both eyes widened in surprise. Swinging around, he swore, lunging forward and drawing back just as quickly as a great tail swooped between him and his raven haired pupil who had detached himself from the group, fucussing his spinning sharingan on his target with an air of determination.

"Dammit, Sasuke, you _idiot!"_ he hissed at the teen. Another chakra tail swung between the two, and the man waited until he could see his student rushing headlong towards the occupied demon. "Get the _hell_ back here!"

Sasuke could feel the victory singing between his fingers, wrapping the explosive tag around several biting shuriken. He smirked triumphantly.  
He couldn't lose.

The weapons in question, he hid below two others, momentarily freezing his feet with concentrated chakra milliseconds before landing on one of the massive burning tails, pushing off and leaping to the next with a great hiss of evaporation. The demon, wildly engaged in singeing the chuunin's clothing with bursts of fire, was howling in animalistic pleasure, and goaded the exhausted man with silky words through the lips of the only child he had cared for. Sasuke pinned his target with blazing eyes, leveling the blades between the buttons of Naruto's spine. Underfoot, the thin surface of chakra-molded ice below his sandals hissed.

Sasuke flung the blades from his body, and was instantaneously pitched backwards, flying through the air with a scalding hot tail embedded in his midsection as Kyuubi howled in rage, unable to react as the blades zeroed in on his vertebrae. Exploding tags, Sasuke thought, detonate on impact. There wasn't a chance.

The explosions rattled his ribcage, jarring his teeth into his lower lip, and Sasuke was smiling, even as his back hit the wall, and everything went silent.

"Sasuke," somebody moaned, and he realized that it was Iruka. "How could- It's still _Naruto_!" The gasped name of his rival sent shivers down the Uchiha's spine, and a deep regret stabbed him in the stomach, rising like bile to settle coldly in his chest.  
_He had killed Naruto._

Sasuke's brain was still rattling loudly in his head, his vision dark and blurry from impact, the shock just settling in, but that _laughter_…  
It shouldn't still be here.

The boy looked up, and choked.

Iruka was standing still now, _everything was still now,_ holding a darkening patch on his forearm, heaving in exhaustion, and looking haggard and spent. The shrapnel was still clattering to the ground around him, and the kunai slipped from his fingers to crash loudly against the creaking wooden floor. For a staggering moment, Sasuke thought he might have hit the chuunin somehow, but the man was digging the shards from his shoulder, and the bloodied pieces he dropped to his side were not the black tipped shuriken Sasuke had launched, but the steel kunai Iruka had used to intercept them. There was a hazy guilt settling in his eyes- they might all die because of him tonight, and the dead _never_ come back- but there was no regret, even looking at the bloodlust in his pupil's slitted eyes.

Kyuubi chortled, curling his nine tails smugly about him, and every move, every gesture, was just so completely _Naruto_ that it was sickening_._

"My, what bony prey I've landed on," he cooed, all teeth and nails _(and a biting poison that rips through the clothes and settles in the chest)_ as Kakashi held a protective arm between the demon and his pink haired student. Sasuke wasn't far behind, leaning against the wall as he attempted to rise with a grimace, the blade of his kunai tipped outward, ready, but quivering. "Hatake Kakashi." Kyuubi sauntered over, dark and quiet with catlike grace and an animalistic hunger that wrapped tightly around the jounin with an airy domination. "Oh, I _do_ remember you."

In a fluid motion, the blonde, his hair gleaming a sandy rose color in the artificial light, was at the man's throat with a kunai, the jounin's sharingan eye spinning wildly as he brought his own blade up to parry the blow. The sweat rolled down his brow as the fox let out a throaty amused howl.

"Umuino Iruka," he purred, not bothering to break eye contact with Kakashi to look at the man creeping up from behind. He had the chuunin's wrist locked in one clawed fist before he could retreat, bending it back effortlessly until the sharp metal clashed from the chuunin's hand to the ground. "I'm not entertained."

"Kyuubi no Kitsune," the older white haired man growled by way of acknowledgement, his voice full of a deep respect, arms shaking as he held off the knife sliding perilously close to his throat. A rope of nearly tangible crimson chakra constricted around the jounin like a snake, thickening into yet another thick tail as one faded out from behind the fox. In seconds, Kakashi was lying motionless across the room, Iruka swearing profusely until, with the lightest shove, he was thrust back next to his companion, leaving deep friction tracks in the rotting wood to mark his progression through the room.

It was sweltering.

Kyuubi smiled, his teeth razor sharp as he grinned winsomely at his prize.

"You. Uchiha. I've been waiting some time now for this," he growled, eyes hidden in shadows accentuating his lazy leer. "Let's fight."

The fine hairs rose on the teen's neck, and a cold sweat was breaking over his body from that _stare._ This wasn't Naruto. This wasn't the dead last happy-go-lucky boy he had sparred with at the academy, pounded into the dirt countless times, and helped back up every time after.

"Idiot," he muttered, his pride not allowing him to lose this mental battle, (dammit, Naruto was still there, _laughing_ at him from those crimson, crimson eyes) but there was an underlying fear of being heard. "It's not…_you._" Tremors ran slightly up and down his frame, neck hairs prickling in response to the bloodlust in those red eyes. The demon did not seem in the least daunted, grinning toothily at the other boy. He had watched his host humiliated by this teen, beaten and embarrassed, and losing every time, and it wasn't so much for Naruto's sake that he played this deadly game, but because revenge was what he was built for, and, _Oh, Naruto, it's _so_ delicious_.

"One and the same," he purred into the shell of the boy's eye, relishing the responding tremors it elicited. "Are you… _scared?_" The blonde swayed forward, his very smile threatening to his surroundings. Unpredictable. And where was Naruto? The loud boy they had so neglected all these years? Obnoxious and determined, whether the world admitted it or not, Konoha just wouldn't be the same without him. And now Sasuke knew why.

Red eyes pinning him to the spot, sharp incisors lengthening, if possible, the demon had him secured to the wall by the neck before he could react. "You were never really a match for me, _dobe_," he whispered mockingly, lips brushing against the other boy's ear.

"Let him go, Naruto! Can't you see he's _suffocating?_" Sakura's eyes were nearly as wide as Sasuke's, tears spilling from their green depths as she tugged imploringly on his jacket, still wet from earlier that night. She stared him down, beseeching from him some sign of the old character she knew. For a moment, the boy's features seem to soften at her voice, but it was not within the demon's cruel nature to act compassionately upon the same faux innocence Naruto had once fallen for. He grinned, flaunting his dominance by applying more pressure and lifting his raven teammate off the ground.

"You're next if you don't shut up, bitch."

Enhanced through the demon's mind, Naruto could feel the rush of pleasure in his very blood that in any other case might have been his own. It surged in his own heart, his own feeling, the very fuel the demon within him was running on. He would defeat Sasuke; his rival in strength, and his rival for Sakura's affection. With Sasuke out of the picture, Sakura would surely-

"What. Was. _That?_" Red eyes fixed on the large hand that had collided with his own, a smirk tipping his lips as he followed the arm up until his gaze rested on a familiar masked face. "Really, _Kakashi,_ is that all you have to give me?" Kyuubi uncurled his clawed fingers, letting the black haired boy drop to the ground gasping, lips moving in a soundless speech. "You, a jounin. How utterly _pathetic._" He gazed at the dried blood caking his finger nails, then swiftly brought a hand up to the jounin's face, wiping the rust colored iron unabashedly against the man's smooth skin. "I could kill you," he said idly when the man refused to move. "And I could make you beg me to kill you." Kyuubi looked up, his red irises flashing, his face flushed with excitement.

As if to prove his point, a clawed hand wrapped around the man's wrist, easily snapping it before the jounin had time to even look.

"Naruto," Iruka whispered from the side, trying to ignore his comrade's sharp breath and grunts of pain as he tried to pull away.

The demon was gripping higher, breaking the elbow now with a grin, not bothering to look as the jounin shouted out. "Naruto's gone, love," he laughed, "It's just you and me and _this_."

There was another crack, another yell, and from somewhere deep in the demon's throat, a responding laugh.

"Naruto," Iruka tried again, "Fight it, Naruto." He cautiously wrapped a gentle hand around the boy's wrist, guiding it away from the gasping man while the demon gazed unfocussed at the juncture between his neck and shoulder. A tremor ran down his spine, and a tired growl slipped past his blackened lips. "_Naruto,"_ he persisted, "come on, Naruto. We'll get out of here, we can go get some ramen after, wouldn't you like that? We'll go to the ocean- I heard you telling Kakashi-sensei you liked the ocean, so, why don't we go there for the weekend, just the two of us-"

Iruka stopped short as the boy's head fell against his shoulder, the ethereal glow subsiding and darkening the room considerably. When Naruto looked up again, disoriented and unbalanced, his eyes were still red, but they were a dull shade of maroon, softened about the edges and more human than they had been that night.

"Sensei?" It was muffled, tired, and there was a heavy weight to the word that the man disliked intensely.

"Hey, I'm here," he whispered back, dropping to his knees on the damp floor, and steadying the boy who followed suit. Naruto cringed slightly, drawing his body into itself.

"I feel…"

Iruka held his head while he vomited to the side.

"Naruto…"

"Ugh," he moaned, pushing away from his teacher and staggering backwards when the man tried to steady him. "Kyuubi… Oh Kami, my head's _spinning_…"

He refused to let Iruka near him while he emptied the contents of his stomach for the second time. "I- I can't… sensei, _he's ripping me up!_" Naruto's voice was reaching hysterics, shielding away from the chuunin, and clutching at his head while the demon fought for control.

"Maybe you should-"

"No," he moaned quietly into his hands. "It's happening all over again…"

"Naruto, calm down, it's just going to-"

"Sensei, I can't stop it… wire- do you have barbed wire?"

"Naruto, what are you-"

"It's the only way to stop it! Do you have any?"

"I-" Why, yes, he did have wire- it was as much a weapon as any kunai or shuriken, but suddenly, it all made disgusting sense. He'd seen this before, had to stitch the wounds shut the last time Naruto had pulled this stunt, and the kid had almost died even then. He hadn't known it last time, meticulously unwrapping the thin wire and pulling it out of the skin of Naruto's wrists, but it was the perfect plan, he had to admit, however revolting the notion. If the demon manifested and struggled against it, it would slice the flesh, and he would either bleed to death, or heal the wounds over the metal, eventually releasing its decaying toxins into the boy's bloodstream. Return the body to the host, or die.

"Naruto, I'm out, but just hold on, just for a-"

Naruto had already started convulsing, thrashing and striking out at the air with curved fingers, and his irises were soaking up the reviving glow from the tails.

"The vest," he growled through lengthening teeth.

"You want my…?"

"Dammit, put it on!"

Iruka glanced at the green vest he had discarded on his arrival only a while before, and that time seemed so distant too him while he listened to the blonde keening on the ground. Not taking his eyes off the boy, he walked to the entrance, picked up the article of clothing, and donned it.

"Naruto, why…?"

"Did you… _miss me?_" The body had stopped shuddering, and strikingly evident though it was, Iruka hated to admit that Naruto had lost the battle against the fox. He wondered vaguely if it hurt the blonde.

From somewhere in the corner, Sakura began hyperventilating loudly, trying to still her ragged breaths, and only gasping louder. Sasuke's head was in her lap, the green glow of her chakra ebbing away from her hands- Iruka assumed she had been healing a head wound; Sakura was always good with that kind of thing. He waited, and the fox was surprisingly calm, watching the girl and unconscious boy with patient, if not humorous, eyes, until she finally ran out of oxygen under his heated gaze, and passed out cold in the corner of the ruined shack.

"Well _that_ was pathetic," the demon sneered, his tails pluming behind him and lashing out like an agitated cat.

There were only eight.

"That's the thing about you mortals," the fox scoffed, thoroughly disappointed in the lack of activity. "You're so frail, and," he was by Kakashi's side in an instant, pinning him by the throat to the wall, and clucking at the man's feeble attempts to summon his dogs. "You all _die_ so easy."

"_Wait!"_

Iruka's hand shot out as if to reach for the monster, knowing where the demon's boredom and implications would lead if he didn't interfere. Kakashi was slowly losing consciousness.

"Wait," the chuunin repeated again, hand still outstretched, edging closer to the fox in his student's body. (_There's an old saying, "A wolf in sheep's clothing", and Iruka thinks that Naruto is the perfect sheep.)_

Iruka was now the one against the wall in a flash, and he was glad he didn't see it coming. Maybe this is how he'll die- all fast movements and blurs and no pain.

He doesn't get his wish.

The claws rip at his chest, at his neck, at his back, and he could feel Naruto's –the _fox's_- hot musty breath on his neck, and there was a fierce anger in the quick movements and raging exhalations. Iruka realized, maybe a moment too late, that the demon did not stand to be patronized by his prey.

"Let them go," he tried anyway, and the nails dug deep into the fabric of his thickly sealed vest, shredding it completely in seconds. (He now realizes why Naruto had him don it, trying not to think of what state his skin would be in without its padded protection). "Naruto, let them go, and no matter what, I'll stay here with you." Iruka was desperate, but he wasn't a liar.

Naruto's eyes darkened slightly, the corners crumbling down in a frustrated frown, and the Kyuubi snarled, determined not to be caught in the same trap again. It's the same tune, just new words, he reminded himself bitterly, raging against his blonde host, hurling himself up against the sewer walls of his mind. The chuunin had no trump card, and as long as he wasn't distracted by the pretty lyrics, there was nothing that the fox could not handle.

Until Naruto snagged his complicated mind and attempted to seize control.

"Dammit, brat, _get the hell out of my mind while I'm playing!"_

For a dazed and blood-deprived moment, Iruka entertained the thought that Kyuubi might be talking to him. He imagined that he was within the fox's mind, but, no, he was never really good at reading people, even when it was clearly written on their faces.

Vaguely aware of his surroundings, and being shaken like a rag doll by an infuriated demon, Iruka did the only thing that seemed natural to him.

"I'm sorry about your life, Naruto," he offered, pulling the teen, fox spirit and eight thrashing tails and all, into a tight embrace, settling his neck as comfortably as he could on the blonde's shoulder, and waited.

Naruto was in chaos.

Ankle deep in the sewage of his mind, and staring at an empty sealed cage, Naruto watched as his own hands attempted to disembowel his teacher, and pausing in just enough time to leave a bloody track of nails across the man's back.

"_Wait, but this is Iruka-sensei!"_ his mind screamed at him, even while the demon raked across skin and burned with fiery deadly tails. _"You can't hurt him! You can't hurt him because he- he…"_

"I love you, Naruto," he whispered.

And everything went black.

Too numb to consider what had happened, Iruka stood rooted in place, rocking back and forth with his blonde student cradled in his arms. He imagined Naruto's eyes were a deep ocean blue, reflected in the shards of weaponry littering the floor like trash before they closed.

"I don't think…he'll remember it." Kakashi rose shakily, gripping his knee for stability before supporting his weight against the wall. "Not this time, anyway, and after all the stress his body's gone through. Not to mention his mind."

"We'll seal the demon the first thing when we get back."

Kakashi nodded, shutting his eyes and hovering in silence for what might have been eternity. Finally, "You're lucky." A forced smile. "All I get from Sasuke is a nasty temper and mood swings."

Iruka snorted. "Like broken arms and damaged property is any better?"

Kakashi attempted a shrug, winced, and gave up. "Maybe not, but watch out where you put your feelings, Iruka," he murmured seriously. "You never know what's going to happen when your back's turned."

"I think I might be willing to chance it." He laughed dryly. "I've got nothing else to lose."

**A/n- Alright, I know Its been a while, but I sort of just fell out of writing fanfictions. :-( Actually, thanks to the consistency of all your wonderful support, I decided to give this another go! Hope you all enjoyed… if I end up writing another chapter, there's probably going to be a little smut right off the bat. I won't burn out your eyes though. :-)**

**...I'd say Barack The Vote... but all our candidate suck... :-(**


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